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How to become an expert at seducing – 7 tips for seduction

To seduce someone is not a cake walk. But mastering the art of seduction isn’t impossible. With the right tips, tricks and ideas, you can become an expert at seduction. But first, let us understand what ‘seduction’ means. The word seduce is derived from a Latin word ‘seducere’ which means ‘to lead astray’. And in some sense, this is what a seducer does. With his charm and intelligence, he leads others astray and makes them do what he wants them to do, without any force.

The term ‘seduce’ or ‘seduction’ is nowadays being used only in the context of making individuals of the opposite gender fall in love with you. But, if you look at the word itself, it has a very broad meaning. It isn’t just a technique for men/women looking for pleasure. Anyone who desires to become popular, or wants to have a good reputation, should know how to seduce others.

Here are the 7 fundamental tricks to help you seduce others easily:

1. Understand the opposite gender

2. Be friendly

3. Don’t hesitate

4. Don’t try to copy someone, be original

5. Dress wisely

6. Be a pleaser

7. Pay attention to your looks

born charmerPeople often have the misconception that one can only be a born charmer, and it’s impossible to learn the skill of seduction. But, we must remember that even those people, whom we consider as born charmers, learned the skill slowly with time. They knew what they wanted in life, and in the way of getting towards it, they became aware of the importance of seduction. And consequently, after many trials and errors, they mastered it as a technique.

So, what is it that this technique consists of, and how can one master it? Well, it is more psychological than physical, and you must have the spirit of a patient learner if you want to get better with it. All you need to seduce correctly is to look into the behavior traits of a seducer and copy them. Here, for your reference, we have posted seven of the most important behavior traits that can turn even an average looking person into a deadly seducer.

  1. Understand the opposite gender

Understand the opposite gender.

The reason behind most of the failed seductions is that we mostly focus on what we want from others. We never give much of a thought to what the others want from us. If we focus simply on that, it will solve half of our problems. By nature, men and women are fundamentally different. It is because of this difference that most of us find it so difficult to understand each other. However, by looking at the world from the other’s perspective, we can bridge this gap. And when you exactly know what the other individual wants from you, you can make your plans accordingly.

  1. Be friendly

Be friendly

Yes, that’s the most important part. Even if you have other intentions, hide them till the time is right. Be frank and make the other person as comfortable as you can. The conversation is the most important part. Show interest in what the other person is saying, even if it doesn’t interest you in the least. If you successfully draw the other person into a nice and cozy conversation, you have achieved half your target. Let the other person open up, and be natural with you. After that, it’s up to you where you can take the conversation.

  1. Don’t hesitate to seduce

 company of opposite gender,

Be smooth in whatever you say or do if you wish to seduce the other person successfully. Any hesitation on your part will reflect repressed desires, which might make the other person uncomfortable. Have you ever noticed that if the other person is being defensive, you automatically start becoming defensive? And this goes the other way around. So, always be smooth. We are generally hesitant when we are doing something for the first time. Therefore, if you frequently go on dates, or simply stay in the company of the opposite gender, you will successfully overcome your hesitation.

  1. Don’t try to copy someone, be original

company of the other gender Many times, to boost our own ego, we think that acting like so and actor might aid us in seducing the opposite gender. He did such a trick in the movie, so maybe even we can pull it off. But, before doing that, remember a few things. In the movie, the actor was himself, and by copying him, you are losing the originality. And just in case if the other person becomes aware of what you are trying to do, it’ll be embarrassing.

Spend more time in the company of the other gender. You’ll soon become aware of what they like about you. Develop the qualities that they like and soon you’ll be the center of attention. You won’t have to pretend anymore.

  1. Dress wisely

Dress wiselyBy carefully selecting your dress, you can change how others perceive you. If you think you have some inherent qualities, you can select your dress in accordance with them. Wear casuals if you are cool and bold, and wear formals if you are serious and intelligent. It’s important you pay attention to the type of image you project, as only then you’ll be able to meet the right kind of people and seduce them.

  1. Be a pleaser to seduce successfully

Be a pleaserBelieve it or not, most of the people around you are yearning for pleasure. They are in desperate need of it. If you make your presence pleasing enough and leave the impression that you can bring the long lost pleasure in someone else’s life, you’ll become irresistible.

  1. Pay attention to your looks

Pay attention to your looksIt isn’t just the dress, there’s a lot more that comes under looks. Your posture, your gestures, and your voice, all these can have an enchanting effect on the others, especially when you are trying to seduce them. So, always have an erect posture, and never slouch while sitting or standing. Do gargles every day, and you’ll get a deep and resonant voice. If you like making gestures while talking, you should practice how to do it perfectly, otherwise, try not making gestures at all.

Inculcating the above-mentioned points in your personality will improve your reputation as a seducer, and they’ll also make you more confident. Nevertheless, these are just the fundamentals, to delve deeply into the art of seducing, and to understand the very psychology behind it, you can refer to books like ‘The Art of Seduction’ by Robert Greene and ‘The System’ by Roy Valentine. Such books will give you in-depth knowledge about your own personality, and you’ll attune it with that of a seducer’s.

If you’ve noticed…

Most of the above-mentioned 7 tips to master the art of seduction requires you to successfully interact with the person of the opposite gender. More often than not, this person will be a complete stranger for you. You might feel shy, scared or nervous at the mere thought of starting a conversation with a stranger. To help you overcome the fear, here are some tricks you must keep in mind before you initiate a word exchange with a stranger.

Breaking the ice: Tips for starting conversations with a stranger

Social anxiety bothers a large number of people around the world. While you may not perceive it to be a problem to bother about, it has some implications which can reflect on your work life and personal life. Also, you may face enough situations in life where you may have to make random acquaintances. Here are some basic tips on starting a conversation with a stranger. Break your introvert shackles and follow these simple guidelines on breaking the ice and starting a conversation.

Before you begin

The thing to remember before you start your conversation is that a good observation of the person may be of good help to know what you might speak about. You can always resort to initial light-hearted ice breaking chats. Do not stress too much about what exactly you would say and just go with the flow.

1.     Make a personal comment

starting conversations with a strangerIt could literally be anything regarding the person. A nice shirt he is wearing, or a nice cologne he is using or his hairstyle or shoes. Such a broad-based start can actually provide you food for carrying the conversation forward.

You can actually be breaking the ice just by asking something as simple as what brand of watch the person is wearing because it is so beautiful. The thing to remember here is, do not get so personal with your comment that the person is offended. Avoid asking if he is wearing a wig for example. Once you receive the answer, build on the answer to initiate the conversation.

2.     Try the where have I seen you before trick

If you are too shy a person to make a random comment, complementing or pointing out something personal about the stranger, this is your go-to solution. This method almost always works. Simply start by asking where you have seen the stranger before because he/she looks familiar.

You could also distort this a bit by asking their school or college name because they look so familiar. This will give you enough opportunity to drag the conversation ahead. For instance, if he says his school name then you could go on about how you had an old friend from that school and before you know it you would be starting a conversation with a stranger. 

3.     Be at your witty best

 saying something rude This can be a great way of talking to unknown people as almost everyone loves a good laugh. You can initiate by saying anything random. For instance, you can point out something funny about your initiate surroundings or about a person in your immediate surroundings. The thing to remember here is that abstain from saying something rude or mean as you then simply come across as a judgmental and mean person. That would obviously hinder the process of you initiating a conversation.

4.     Asking about the person’s profession

This is another easy way of beginning conversations. A majority of people are willing to share their work details while on the go. So you can always start off by introducing yourself and then go on to ask details about the other person’s work. Before you know it you would be hitting it off and the conversation you so dreaded would become a fun conversation.

5.     Asking for an introduction on someone

Asking for an introduction on someoneTo implement this method, you need to have something in common with the stranger and some basic knowledge of him. For example, if you know the kind of people the stranger knows, a great way to start off is by asking more details about some particular person due to some business that you might have with him. Most people would be happy to help and the conversation can soon change its track to different topics making it a complete conversation.

6.     The weather and the traffic

This is one of the safest and easiest routes to take and if you are wondering about how to start even now, this is your key. Nobody can possibly get offended with a conversation about the weather or the traffic. As you go hearing the grievances of the stranger regarding the tedious traffic, you will start a long conversation before you know it.

Share your thoughts too, be light-hearted and be amazed thereafter at how effective this topic is. The weather can be too hot or too cold and it would not matter because everyone has an opinion on it. Avoid rough weathers in the conservation by talking about the general weather.

7.     Talk about sports or a recent popular movie

Talk about sports or a recent popular movieThis may be a bit tricky as your attempt might be futile if the person is not interested in it.  But if it syncs, you have long conversations up ahead. For example, if you see a man in Manchester United uniform and start talking about what he feels regarding their performance this season, you can hardly go wrong. A movie buff would always be eager to discuss movies and a popular movie means that chances are high that he likes it too.

Note:  Just remember to be relaxed during the process. You do not want the stranger to guess that you are actually just trying to initiate a conversation. Starting a conversation with a stranger is a simple task but could go wrong as well. Do not be discouraged if it doesn’t work out. Remember there are millions of people in your city. Avoid being rude or making derogatory remarks and stay clear of controversial topics and you are good to go.

Final words

We hope that after giving this a read, how to start talking to unknown people is no longer an issue. It is a valuable lesson that you learned and you can put this to use in several walks of your life. This will add to your character certain confidence and flamboyance and you will just by following these simple tips on starting a conversation with a stranger become more socially acceptable. Enjoy your new found powers!

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Dr Prem Jagyasi (c)

Dr Prem is an award winning strategic leader, renowned author, publisher and highly acclaimed global speaker. Aside from publishing a bevy of life improvement guides, Dr Prem runs a network of 50 niche websites that attracts millions of readers across the globe. Thus far, Dr Prem has traveled to more than 40 countries, addressed numerous international conferences and offered his expert training and consultancy services to more than 150 international organizations. He also owns and leads a web services and technology business, supervised and managed by his eminent team. Dr Prem further takes great delight in travel photography.

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