Child adoption cases are becoming a rare phenomenon nowadays. But, adoption of a little one as a part of the family requires dealing with some critical issues. If you already have a child at home, whether biological or adopted, you need to assure that they are in complete support of your decision. They will have a number of questions in their mind and answering them is solely the responsibility of a parent.
Here are some points that will help you find ways to deal with such questions:
1. Be honest
The foremost thing that your children will expect from you is complete honesty. Children can sense if things are fishy around them and it can make them extremely anxious. You should look for a right time to discuss the issue with your children regarding the matter. Remember your child needs time to adjust with this situation. Another thing that you should make sure is that, your children should treat the person well who will be visiting your place to help you decide whether the adoption decision is right for you or not. There is a possibility that the children may fear him, considering him an outsider. Therefore, inform your children regarding this in advance.
2. Don’t ever give them a choice
This is an important point that deserves your attention. Never give your child an option regarding the adoption decision. Your child should be aware that it will be your final decision that will be considered and not his/her. Gradually, you can convince your child, but if once he makes a negative choice, then things may get even worse. An adoption after this situation will make your child feel betrayed.
3. Include your children in the process
You should always emphasize on including your children in the adoption process. As, this decision can significantly impact your entire family. No matter how old your child is, they want to be a part of the process as much as possible. Talk to your children regarding the adjustments they will have to make with the new family member. For example- how will they eat, where will they sleep, their studying and playing schedule etc. The best way to make your child understand this is by involving them into preparations such as buying clothes, diapers, and other necessary things.
4. Reassuring the children
The biggest problem you are likely going to face during adoption is the fear in the minds of your other children. It is natural that your children may be afraid of the segregation in their parents love. Here your role is to keep reassuring your child that you will always be loved in the same way and the new member is not going to make any difference in the family. In fact he/she will bring more love in the family. Insecurity is another fear that a child faces during adoption. They may think that their new sibling may leave them in future. Assure them that once they get a sibling, he/she will always be with them as a family member.
Adding a sibling to your family is not at all easy. But if you succeed in preparing your other children for the same, then the situation can be handled properly.
