Attachment parenting is the extra caring approach towards upbringing your infant. The baby shares the same bed as the parents and enjoys the comfort of having his parents in the vicinity, just when he needs them. Speculation always surrounds the advantages and disadvantages of this mode of parenting. Let’s have a look at this mode of parenting in detail.
Attachment parenting: The essence
There are many reasons that help establish attachment parenting as a worthy mode of parenting. In order to nurture a healthy relationship with children as they grow up, it is perhaps only natural that parents exhibit a more loving and caring approach when attending to the needs of their child. This is where attachment parenting scores.
1. Foundation for a closer relationship between the child and the parents
As parents are more attentive to the emotional needs of the child and attend to the baby just when he needs them, a strong emotional attachment develops between the baby and the parents. It is a process that enables mutual connection. While the mother breastfeeds and comforts the child, prolactin hormone is released in the mother which helps her calm down. Attachment parenting makes the bringing up of a child, an enriching experience for the parents as well.
2. Gives a fillip to the learning process of the child
When you are constantly interacting with your baby, you are able to read the baby’s cues for his different needs while at the same time the baby is quick to learn your language. It is the people around the baby who shape the growth of his cognitive abilities. While there may be several smart tools and games available in the market for such a purpose, if you can be there to make the child learn the smallest of things, there can be nothing better for the child than that.
3. Makes the child more secure and content
A baby brought up through the attachment parenting method is more at ease with his surroundings. As the baby is assured of your presence around, you will not see the baby crying for the company of near and dear ones. This only makes your baby more confident while he explores newer things. If you are not able to take care of the emotional needs of your child, the baby spends most of the time crying and longing for the presence of the parents. Attachment parenting encourages the child onto a path of discovery as the baby is emotionally secure.
4. Parents become an integral part of the child’s formative years
Attachment parenting works well not just for your baby but also for you. It makes you more organized as you do not have the luxury of having all the time to yourself. You become more compassionate and learn to empathize with others. In addition, when you are there for your baby during the initial years, you get to see your baby taking the first step, saying the first word and all the things that you hold dear and remember to recall and tell for the rest of your lives.
5. Works better for the behavioral development of the baby
Attachment parenting makes the child develop into a cheerful toddler. This is because the baby is not left to cry to pacify on its own without the comfort of someone to cuddle him. The tender care of parents also gives to the baby the qualities of being caring and loving towards others. This shapes their behavior as they grow up. A baby left to its own may not be able to relate to people on an emotional level. It may also make your baby emotionally distant from you and other family members.
Attachment parenting: The criticism
Despite the many advantages that attachment parenting brings to you, there are some problems that this mode of parenting suffers from.
1. Requires the parents to make compromises on a professional level
It is almost impossible for a parent to raise a child through attachment parenting methodology and at the same time be able to work full time with the attendant work pressures and the busy work schedules. It is inevitably the mother, who ends up compromising on her career for the sake of the child. The lack of support from the family makes it even worse. In such a scenario, women have to leave their jobs or work from home in the little time they get for themselves.
2. Makes the child dependent
Children who are used to having their parents around even when they go to sleep, find it difficult later on to sleep in a separate room. Attachment parenting delays the process of the child weaning itself off his parents in order to be more accepting of the world that exists beyond this.The child seeks the company of the parents even when he needs to go out and play with other children.
3. Results in marital problems
As parents give all the attention to their child, their own relationship suffers with little time to spare for each other. Family time ends up as the time that is spent on looking after the kid. In whatever little time the parents get, they are too tired to even interact with each other. Lack of support system, in the form of other family members who can take care of the baby for some time through a day, further takes its toll.
4. Has a detrimental impact on your sleeping pattern and overall health
Parents and infants sharing the same bed, invite criticism that may smother your baby by accident while sleeping in the same bed after a tiring day. Co-sleeping also means that as the baby cries, you need to wake up to make him go back to sleep again. In the long run, not being able to sleep well at night, makes you irritable and short tempered. Lack of sleep also works against you in making you weaker in terms of your immunity against diseases.
5. Lacks research based backing
Multiple benefits of attachment parenting are based on observation and an understanding of matters in general. The results cannot be attributed to any research. Eventually, it is the parent who need to decide on the kind of method they wish to use in order to ensure that their child grows up into a happy, mature and confident individual. Lack of research and contradictory views given by different people, make this a difficult choice for parents.
