Sure, sitcoms like Modern Family highlight the fun side of the blended family and unconventional relationships, but a reality check will tell you how step parenting is a tough nut to crack.
For the most part, it involves constant efforts from step parent to revive and redesign an already existing pattern of relationship with the children but trying too hard is yet another problem. What stepparents must understand that children are individual and have their take towards the things they like and the things they don’t. In this article, we will know about the top 7 books that step parent should read as initial steps towards making the relationship with their children bloom.
7 – Books for Step Parent to Read
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The 5 Love Languages for Children by Chapman, Campbell & Campbell-
Every child has his/her on ways of expression which the authors term as ‘Love Language’. The book emphasises the fact that every child speaks a unique language of love that parents have to understand and reciprocate in the same way often. The authors have talked about five general languages of love which are quality time, physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service and gifts. Parents or stepparent need of master each of these languages and ensure they communicate with their children likewise more often to meet their children’s emotional needs. -
No Regrets Parenting:
Turning Long Days and Short Years into Cherished Moments with Your Kids by Harley Robert, M.D- The book focuses on answering some most common questions asked by the readers that are, whether they are trying hard enough to be a good parent and how they must put away the feelings of guilt for not doing what they must do for their children. This book is a guide for parents to follow so that there develops a common ground of understanding between parents and children.The book is divided into two parts- the first focuses on providing the children with ‘eight essentials’ which includes emotional support, education, security, stability, love, consistency, positive role models, structure while keeping away from distraction, deception and distortion. The second part covers effective strategies of child rearing for the stepparent to spend fruitful years with their child as they grow up. -
The Irreducible Needs of Children by T. Berry Brazelton and Stanley Greenspan-
This book emphasises on meeting the basic needs of the children which, in the two childcare expert’s opinion, is not met by the society. These needs include the need for healthy and nurtured relationships, safety needs, need for cultural continuity and stable support communities. The book also includes tips on how parents should fulfil their child’s irreducible needs. This is among the most considered books for stepmoms and stepfather to help them identify their child’s immediate needs. -
The 10 Greatest Gifts I Gave My Children:
Parenting from Heart by Steven W. Vannoy- From the author of ‘Chicken Soup for the Soul’, this classic parenting book has helped parents employ positivity in their relationships with the children.The author’s ultimate goal is to help parents in designing a unique style of parenting which shall ultimately lead to a harmonious relationship with their children. It also suggests parents inculcate the values of self-esteem, compassion, expression of emotions, balance in nature, communication, humour, responsibility and conscious choices.This book not only tells parents how to strike a chord in sync with their children but has also helped businesses flourish by laying down certain principles for the employees to follow which shall effectuate harmonious work environment — a great choice from among parenting books for stepfathers and stepmoms. -
The Magic Years:
Understanding and Handling the Problems of Early Childhood by Selma H. Fraiberg- Couples new to parenting, especially a step parent may have a tough time dealing with the behaviour of their children which they may often find erratic. This book gets the readers to see things from their children perspective and understand why they do what they do. The author proceeds to discuss the challenges faced and the problems encountered by children at the stages of development and is a general guideline for parents to e able to understand their children more than ever. The profound insight to understanding a child that this book provides is the reason it makes it to this list of the best books for stepfather and stepmoms to read. -
Get Out of My Life, but First Could You Drive Me and Cheryl to the Mall:
A Parent’s Guide to New Teenager by Anthony E. Wolf- New found adolescence may bring up colours that parents have never seen before. Teenagers can often be rebellious, and their demeanour may be harder to deal with. This book is a humorous take on the issues that adolescence has to deal with and is a great parental guide on eradicating all hard feelings and savours a strong and fruitful relationship with their children. -
Simplicity Parenting:Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer Happier and More Secure Children by Kim John Payne and Lisa M. Ross-
Often children growing up in a blended family start developing certain patterns of complex behaviour which may later prove to be a toxic character trait affecting their personal life. This book is a guide for the parents to adopt certain principles which eliminate clutter, stress and other distractions from their child’s life. It also advises parents to provide emotional and physical nourishment to their children and not just pamper them. It lays stress on the need for parents to keep things simple, avoid over parenting, building routines for the children and be familiar with the concept of food, sleep and rest.
There is no perfect manual for parents to help them wholly understand their children and justify why they feel what they feel. Also, books for stepmoms and stepfathers based on parenting advice do not promote any steadfast ways of parenting. That only help in understanding the pattern of relationships better and help parents do away with hard feelings, which may often creep into their minds.
