As parents, we want to do things for our children in the best possible manner and give them whatever we can. We put in all efforts to be compassionate, encouraging, sympathetic, thoughtful and dutiful, but may not excel in the end. Each child reacts and responds to a particular situation in a different manner and though we may know our children well, there might be some misunderstandings due to communication gaps. While trying to discipline the children, we might simply be harsh and cause anger and frustration in them. Hence, there are a few mistakes, that parents should avoid, while dealing with kids.
1. Spoiling Kids
Parents try to balance their personal-professional life. They worry about giving the best to their children in the form of materialistic things and tend to give them more and more. However, parents should not forget that their children want to spend more time with them. In the bargain, they do not value even the highly expensive gifts and become thankless. For instance, it is your child’s birthday and you have to leave you kid under the supervision of a nanny for an urgent outdoor trip. On returning, you get him or her five to seven gifts. However, your child is not concerned about you but, busy with the gifts.
2. Inadequate Discipline
If you don’t teach mannerisms to your children, then you create problems, not only for yourself, but also, for everyone else. They might get you into embarrassing situations in public. So, they must be trained how to behave themselves at home and in the society as well. For instance, when you tag your child along with yourself for a dinner party he or she should have adequate table manners thereby, not touching anything around and causing no irritation to your host.
3. Failing to Get Involved at School
Parents should make sure that they get involved in most of the activities at school, such as, parents’ meet, Annual Day and Sports day. Your presence will make your children feel proud and also encourage them to study and perform better at school. On the other hand, your involvement in such matters will keep you aware of all the things that are happening in your child’s life. Kids always want to be acknowledged and rewarded in front of their parents. Please, don’t forget to be in constant touch with their teachers.
4. Praising Mediocrity
Praising your kid often will boost their morale, but it needs to be done at the right time and for the right reason. Praising all the time will not help too much, because it may just lose its value and your kid will never get into the habit of winning. For instance, your child participated in 100 metres race, but invariably stopped every time during the event. In such a situation, instead of applauding your kid for mere participation, ensure that you make your child understand the significance of finishing the race.
5. Not Giving Kids Enough Responsibility
Kids learn more from what is happening at home than in schools or colleges. It should start with small activities, such as, stacking away the vessels after dinner, dusting away the cob- webs and cleaning their own lockers. These activities should, of course, be incorporated into their daily routine in order to enhance the feelings of independence, responsibility and accountability in them.
6. Not Being a Good Spouse
Kids adopt 70% of their behavioral patterns from their home environment. When they watch their parents loving and respecting each other, they also develop a similar attitude. On the contrary, if the parents have regular fights and continuous arguments in front of their children, the little ones get adversely affected and behave in the same manner with their friends.
7. Setting Unreal Expectations
We must not forget that the little ones, whom we deal with, are our small kids. Please, don’t expect things from them which are very difficult to be achieved. Being their parents, we understand their capabilities very well and hence, set targets, which they can easily accomplish. This will enable them to imbibe a sense of self-achievement and achieve their goals in the long run.
8. Not Teaching Kids to Fend for Themselves
As parents, we love them and also decide, what to make out of them. We must make them feel responsible for their own acts. We ought to counsel them whenever they make mistakes. However, they cannot repeat their errors time and again and get away..
9. Pushing Trends on Kids
Most often, parents want to see their children achieve what they have missed out. As a result, they pressurize the kids to such an extent that their plans fail. Parents should not impose their ambitions on their kids. Just because you wanted to be a doctor and due to financial reasons, you could not became one, does not imply that, you have to make a doctor out of your child. Allow your kids to follow their passions and excel.
10. Not Following Through
There are times when you tell your kids that unless they finish their homework they might not get to pounce on their favorite pudding. Nevertheless, next time, when you see red remarks in your kid’s notebook, you still give a piece of pudding to your kid, assuming that, he might complete his homework before time. This is where many parents fail. Instead, you should make the child understand the importance of completing the homework on time. In case, your child is a defaulter, you can excuse him or her once. However, don’t encourage your child to repeat such a mistake. In case your kid has problems, you should be highly approachable as a parent.
