It certainly takes a lot of time and efforts to make kids understand the difference between good and bad. You cannot expect your kids to know it all. Allow them to make mistakes and set good standards for them to follow. Those parents who wish to change the traditional methods of parenting must understand that kids learn by mistakes. Introduce your kids to the real world that is certainly not their dream world.
Take the control in your own hands
Modern parents often treat their kids like their friends and fail to understand that kids need parents to guide and teach them not friends. The result is that kids scream, shout aloud, abuse and even get violent when parents ask them to follow the rules. Those parents who give in to the demands of their kids convey the message that it is not that hard to change or amend the rules.
It is important that parents understand that their job is to set limitations, they have no control over how kids react back. Take the control in your hands at an early stage as your kids may give you a hard time if your keep waiting for the right time. The longer you wait the harder it gets. Do not feel guilty, as setting limitations is only a way to teach them self-discipline.
Effect of saying “No” on kids’ behavior and mind
Saying no to your kids certainly kills you deep down inside. You do not want your kids to feel bad or put on a sad face but you must know that these limitations can give them a better future. Kids do not know the difference between good and bad until they get the guidance of their parents.
It break their heart to hear the word “no” the first time but when you make them understand they can relate with it. With time, they learn to deal with disappointment, frustration, failure and delayed gratification that give them valuable lessons of life.
Things that can be toxic
Those parents who find it hard to turn down the requests of their kids fail to inculcate values in them. No doubt, you may feel guilty when you see disappointment on your kids’ faces but you must not give in to their demands.
You should not hesitate to tell your kids that you can’t afford to buy certain things as it prepares them to face harsh realities of life. Don’t center your world around your kids as it does not help them in anyway.
How to say no to your kids
Some people would argue the point that it really does not matter how you say no to your kids as the result is the same but it usually depends upon the situation. You must discuss your reasons but make sure you do not overdo things. Saying a flat no may sound bad but there are times when there is no way other than this. You can also put off your four year old by saying you will think about it but it does not convey a clear message.
Take is easy
You cannot expect to change everything overnight. Task it easy as you may have to invest time and efforts to make your kids learn to live with limitations. The moment you feel like giving in to your kids demands, think of the outcomes. However, at times you can give options. You can tell them that they can go outside to pay with their friends once they finish their breakfast or watch TV when they finish their homework.
You cannot keep your kids from facing difficulties of life. Giving in to their demands convey the message that they can get what they want which can be harmful for them in the end. You cannot keep them happy or give them rewards for every little thing they do as real world has real problems for all.