Family & Parenting Guide

Don’t impose your own ideals on your children – let them find their own path

Most parents start making plans for the better future of their kids the very moment they get to know that they are going to be parents soon. They want their kids to pick subjects of their choice and want them to choose a career, which they think is best for them. Then comes a moment when reality hits them and they get to know that their kids have different choices and they are not what they want them to be. The best solution however is to accept your kids the way they are. Here are a few tips to deal with such a situation.

Get to know your kids better

Observe your kids and get to know their likings and disliking. You may have kids who require your attention and want you to be there with them at almost each step. Unlike your best friend’s kids, your kids may be stubborn and disorganized. You may have kids fail to learn things on their own and you may have to be there to make them understand. They may not be as sharp and obedient as you wanted them to be but that is all right. You cannot expect all kids to be equally smart and confident. Learn to accept your kids with their weaknesses.

Set realistic expectations

When you start observing your kids, you are able to set realistic goals and prepare yourself to support them. Do not expect your kids to love sports that you liked when you were a teenager. They are different human beings who may have different needs and requirements. When you accept your kids with their choices, they may surprise you by making choices that you think are best for them. Remember you can never keep your kids happy with the choices you make for them.

Let go off your own choices

There may be moments when you realize that instead of playing football they love to paint. This may be difficult for you to accept the fact they do not want to study higher as they may want to choose dancing as their profession. Moments like this can be heartbreaking but you must face the realty and let go off your own dreams for the sake of their happiness. What matters the most is the fact that your want your kids to find their passion and live happily.

It is an ongoing process

You may have to deal with the different choices when they are in kindergarten, high school, and even when they are in college. Your kids may be shy in adolescence but that does not mean that they would not make friends and would fear social situation. They may need your support and guidance. Be there and tell them that they can trust you and you would love and support them come what may. They may not agree with you on everything but your support and encouragement may turn them into successful human beings in life.

Make family rules

Accepting your kids does not mean that you tolerate their bad behavior or do not try to correct their mistakes. They may have their own choices but as a parent you must not ignore if they are irresponsible or do not respect others. The way you respond to them must set good examples and help them turn into not only successful but also good human beings.

You must not ignore the fact that those kids whose parents do not accept them for who they are can never focus on their priorities, as they are always confused with their choices. On the contrary, when you accept and appreciate your kids for who they are, you not only strengthen your bond but also pave way for their success.


Dr Prem Jagyasi and Team

Dr Prem is an award winning strategic leader, renowned author, publisher and highly acclaimed global speaker. Aside from publishing a bevy of life improvement guides, Dr Prem runs a network of 50 niche websites that attracts millions of readers across the globe. Thus far, Dr Prem has traveled to more than 40 countries, addressed numerous international conferences and offered his expert training and consultancy services to more than 150 international organizations. He also owns and leads a web services and technology business, supervised and managed by his eminent team. Dr Prem further takes great delight in travel photography.

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