Things you should know about post-pregnancy sex

Post pregnancy sex is not as exciting for a woman as it is for her partner. After being deprived of sexual pleasures for a long period of time, your husband will be eager to start things anew. You, however, may not find the idea of regular sex appealing even after the six weeks long safety period is over. The main reason behind this is pain and discomfort.

 happy mother laughing with baby in crib

According to a recent medical study, sex naturally feels painful for women after childbirth pertaining to different reasons. Among 10 women who have given birth, around 9 find sex to be painful the first time they have intercourse after the delivery. In the following the possible causes of this pain and tips for making it less painful have been discussed.

Reasons why sex hurts after birthing

 vaginal dryness

Stitches are one of the main culprits because of which you have to feel pain during intercourse. To make vaginal delivery smoother, the surgeons or gynecologist present in the delivery room cuts open the perineum. This increases the size of the vagina. After the delivery, the surgeon stitches this area and sometimes adds an extra stitch called the ‘husband’s stitch.’

It reduces the size of the vagina and makes it tighter than before. Though it is supposed to help your married life, it can be the reason why sex suddenly becomes painful. Pain can occur even when the stitches have healed because of the scar tissues that form close to the vagina. This sensitive tissue can render sex to be painful.

New mothers have to breastfeed their babies many times and this lowers the levels of arousal hormones inside their body. This can cause a drop in your libido and lead to vaginal dryness. Dryness inside the vagina means more friction during penetration which can be painful. The new born occupies a big part of the mother’s consciousness and she worries about the child even when having sex.

 Excessive stress

Excessive stress can make the muscles on your pelvic floor tense up during sex and reduce the size of your vagina and anus. This can be the cause of sex becoming painful even after considerable amount of time has passed. C-section delivery also needs stitches, which lead to the development of scar tissues causing pain during penetration.

A group of Australian researchers have found that one-quarter of women complain of having pain during sex after 18 months of giving birth. This can be frustrating for both the partners and make them drift apart. The researchers have also confirmed that women who deliver baby through C-section operation or vaginal extraction method are more likely to find sex painful afterwards.

Tips for making sex less painful for new mothers

 neck massage

Do not let your husband skip foreplay even if he is already in the mood for the groove. You need it for getting the juices flowing and feeling aroused. Ask him to massage your neck, shoulders and back. It will make your feel relaxed. After your breastfeed your baby at night, drink a small portion of wine to loosen up and feel more comfortable in your own skin. It will dissolve the worries about your body image and the baby. Don’t get drunk though. Use a lubricant that does not cause allergy and suits your needs. Water based or silicon based lubricants are less messy and easily cleaned.


Sex can be painful after you have given birth. Try lubricating the vagina to reduce the dryness and friction. If nothing works consult your gynecologist to check if there is some problem other than scar tissue sensitivity or vaginal dryness.

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