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How to deal with a selfish boyfriend

Selfish boyfriend are those who thinks only about themselves. These guys may not have displayed any selfish signals in the initial period. These things come out in the open gradually and unfortunately by that time the girl is so captivated by the boy that everything looks happy and sparkly. Here are some ways to deal with a selfish boyfriend.

Confront him

You have to confront your boyfriend in order to deal with his selfishness. He has to know that the way he acts is just not right. Of course there will be strong opposition from his side. In fact he will deny it out rightly but do not fret over it too much. If you do not tell him how you really feel about his selfish and egotistical attitude, he will never be able to rectify it. It is perfectly alright if he threatens to leave or even walks out of the door. He will most probably come back to you very soon. You cannot assume such a habit to go away in a jiffy. The boyfriend has to ponder over what all you have told him. It is going to be something like a self revelation to him. He might and might not take it very pleasantly. But at least you can breathe easy now that you have dealt with the situation in a sensible manner.

Cease to give that extra attention

You may not know this but you might be equally responsible for your boyfriend’s selfish behavior. The preliminary stage of any relationship is all lovey lovey. You like to mollycoddle your boy friend without knowing that you are creating a beast. Once he is accustomed to expect specific favors from you, it’s going to be difficult for you to stop indulging him. So you become responsible for making your boy friend selfish. Now it is time to stop all that exclusive attention that you gave him before. So the next time he orders you to fetch him that bottle of beer or change the channel, say no right away. You do not have to rebuff him offensively. You can do it in a very lighthearted manner. But you have to make it clear that from here onwards you will be sharing decisions concerning all things in life. If your boyfriend objects too aggressively, it is time for him to say goodbye.

Live life on your own terms

Incidences like this can really act as big dampeners. It is very difficult to handle such tricky situations. But you have to forget such issues or else they will make your life miserable. Live your life on your terms. Take proper care of yourself and your family. You can even think that you are living without him. Bring in your own money, accumulate your own savings, and pay your own bills etc. In other words take control of everything and look after your home. Your boyfriend will have more respect for you once he realizes how strong and self sufficient you are. The desire to make you happy will definitely make him become less selfish and irresponsible. You cannot forgo your individuality just for the sake of a relationship which does not exist on mutual understanding and sharing. It will become too claustrophobic for you .

Look for mutual interests

If your boy friend is not too much of an egotistical brute, you can always keep your eyes open for common hobbies. Indulge in activities you take pleasure in doing together. Maybe you will have to compromise a little bit; it is only a little thing to give up in order to save your relationship. There might be somethings which will fascinate him. You might not like it too much but you can at least put up with it. It will work like a therapy for him and if it works, he will obviously notice your behavior. He might even start compromising as well and become less self centered. Half the battle is won even if you can attempt to do this a little bit. Try doing things which both of you enjoyed doing before. You must have done some crazy lovey stuff in the onset of your relationship. Forget about now and take a time machine back into the past. It will definitely spice up your life.

Let go the hard feelings

Sometimes certain things are just not meant to happen. Give your best shot to bail out your relationship. If everything else fails, talk it out with a professional counselor. They do have solutions for such kind of behavioral pattern. Egotistical attitude is a studied characteristic and it can be eradicated with the help of professional therapy. But if your boy friend does not change a bit and remains as stubbornly selfish as ever, it is time for you to move on. Be thankful to God that you got to know about this trait before you both got married to each other. It would have become such a terrible mess. Maybe you have someone much better in store for you. This will hurt for sometime but it is like an eye opener for you. So, let go and look forward to a brighter future.

Dr Prem Jagyasi

Dr Prem Jagyasi

Author, Publisher & Global Speaker at DrPrem.com
Dr Prem is an award winning strategic leader, renowned author, publisher and highly acclaimed global speaker. Aside from publishing a bevy of life improvement guides, Dr Prem runs a network of 50 niche websites that attracts millions of readers across the globe. Thus far, Dr Prem has traveled to more than 40 countries, addressed numerous international conferences and offered his expert training and consultancy services to more than 150 international organizations. He also owns and leads a web services and technology business, supervised and managed by his eminent team. Dr Prem further takes great delight in travel photography.
Dr Prem Jagyasi
Dr Prem Jagyasi
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