Though some of us would vouch that we have not been envious of others even once, it would be a blatant lie. If you are an achiever and have too many laurels in you cap, itâs likely that you meet many an envious colleague or a friend on a daily basis. Here are some sure ways to deal with them.
Accept the situation
Achievement and envy go hand in hand and nothing can be done about it in many cases. If you can tolerate it, the best thing to do is to feel good about your achievements and the fact that there are many out there who have been trying way too hard to be in your shoes and could not do it. You are indeed unique and that is what makes others envious of you and feel bad about themselves. If you have been meeting too many envious people these days who have been bordering on rude behavior, make it a point to emphasize your achievements and let them know that you deserve it and would not have it any other way. This might throw them off track, even though you might earn reputation as someone who is very proud and vainglorious. But as long as your friends and loved ones know what you are, nothing really matters. You are just trying to deal with the situation in the best possible manner.
Ignore the remarks
Some people can be very rude and can get on your nerves. You can either choose to be rude with them as well or just ignore them which is a better way to avoid altercations and friction. This stance might work if you are not connected much to that person either through work or through personal relations. Nothing much changes if you are rude or choose to ignore them. But when it comes to personal relations or close friends, this may not be a great way to deal with envy. Ignoring your friend or your loved one could lead to more envy and ill will and the pent up anger and feelings that you start developing for the person will spoil your relation as well. So avoid this stance with close friends, associates and relatives.
Offer to help them
When the envy comes from people you care and are close to, you can be of help to them by trying to guide them in the right track. You can tell them about how you have worked hard for your achievements and how easy it is to be an achiever if you have the right attitude and mind to struggle. This will help them understand that they have not been as great as you and need more grit and determination to reach where you are now. Sometimes, this understanding will help them get over their jealousy and accept you as a truly great person devoid of any envy and willing to help as well. Let them into your secrets to the success. This will give them great confidence and instil in them a sense of healthy competition, asking them to try harder and achieve what you have been able to do. Such camaraderie and healthy competition is necessary for removing envy in personal and close professional relationships. Your actions will make them regret their attitude towards you and they will surely make an effort to change their behavior.
Communicate your feelings
If you find that envy is eating into a personâs brain as much as it is becoming a nuisance for you, try and talk to that person on a one to one basis. Let him know that you understand his feelings of jealousy and it does not help him in any way other than break his peace of mind and sleep. You may advice him as to where he has been lacking in his skills and efforts and help him device better strategies to improve next time. Show him that he has been deficient in his preparations and what he need to do t reach the level you are in now, rather than taint his mind with envy and ill will.
React when things go overboard
When situations go out of control and when an envious person is out to taint your name as well as reputation, you must react and not keep quiet. You know that you deserve what you have earned and no one should be allowed to tamper with your achievements. React openly if he has been spreading stories or have a private tÃªte Ã tÃªte with the person, warning him to stop his obnoxious acts, or face the consequences. Reacting openly in front of people will make him think twice before spreading stories next time. This would be all that he needs to stop his act or at least stop envying you openly. People who envy are always insecure about themselves and their achievements and you will be working on his feeling of insecurity by an open reaction.