Dealing with roommates requires certain knack and tact, failing which you will end up having frequent cat and dog fights that are never ending and will lead to great disturbance not just for you, but for others who co- exist with you. Discussed below are certain simple rules that will create a harmonious and peaceful room for you to live.
Choose your roommate
Before you shift into a room, whether it is a hostel or a house where you share your room, it is important to have a chit chat with the people who are going to share rooms with you and vice versa. This will help you understand their mental makeup, preferences, habits, moods, culture and their overall personality. Check if the roommate is mentally compatible with you, which is one of the essential requirements to be in harmony with each other as long as you stay together. You can ask him/her frankly as to what are their habits and dislikes. This will enable you to understand whether there are things that you may disapprove on moral grounds or otherwise. You too can communicate your habits and general attitude towards life. If you find that you have similar interests, preferences and habits, then you can be sure that you have found the right person to co-exist with. Talking with your roommate beforehand will help minimize a lot of issues later on and help you remain friendly and communicative.
Communicate effectively
Communication is a very important factor that helps in clearing many misunderstandings and annoyances with roommates. Many times, roommates suffer silently because they do not want to create an issue. These pent up feelings will emerge as a volcano one day and things go out of control. If there is something that bothers you, just be frank about it and communicate it to your roommate. Whether he/she is willing to change his/her habit for you or not is a matter that can be dealt with in the course of the events. The first step is to never suffer without communication. Your roommate may not be aware that you are fuming and boiling in silence. Telling him/her about your irritation will put an end to the friction and ease up things. Communication need not be only about issues. Simple and everyday communication too keeps you grounded and friendly and reduce issues between you. Ask about your roommateâs day, work, studies and family on a regular basis to create a friendly atmosphere in the room.
Set guidelines
It helps to set certain rules and guidelines that you can follow. This can be about cleaning the room, keeping the room well arranged and tidy, and about personal preferences. If your roommate likes music, allow some time for that and if you like to jazz; let your roommate set some time for you as well. This way, there is no room for complaint and things will sail smoothly between you. You can also set time for late night sessions. If you are a late sleeper, then use a reading lamp which will prevent your roommate from getting disturbed and so on
Fight when necessary
All is not hunky dory with your roommate and issues are bound to blow out of proportion at times. Be prepared for such things and depending on how you deal with the situation, you may or may not end up being the worst of enemies. Try and avoid big fights. Discuss things peacefully and see if things can be resolved between the two. Do not fight openly and attract attention. It does not help if you shout at each other and hurl abuses. If possible involve a good friend as a mediator and see if you can reach a solution and minimize the chances of shifting rooms midway. Most problems can be solved with good judgement and if you have a mind to forgive.
Leave room for compromises
Sometimes, you might have to compromise on certain rules and guidelines and change them to suit your new schedule. This could be during exam time when you can no longer allow time for music or jazz or any other personal things which causes disruption in your study schedules. In such cases, you both can sit together and create a new set of plan to be followed during the months of preparation and exams. This will solve matters amicably and avoid fights and issues for which you do not have the time or the inclination. Leaving space for compromises is one of the prerequisites for sharing a great and friendly relationship with your roommate.
