How to deal with a rebellious teenager

Teenage is a difficult phase of life for teenagers as well as their parents. At this stage teenagers turn moody and rebellious due to various hormonal changes in their body and they find it challenging to cope up with the changes.

Have a broad mind-set

Teenagers go through various hormonal changes and feel various kinds of pressures. At such a vital stage of their life they need their parents’ support and their confidence. They don’t need their parents as an authority to manage their lives, as they need someone in whom they could confide all their problems without any fear of being judged.

Have an open frame of mind while dealing with your rebellious teenage kids. Let them know that they could always come to you to share their problems under any circumstances. Sometimes they might need some time alone. Give them some room to work out their issues. Don’t push too hard, and give them some privacy. They would come to you on their own whenever they would be ready.

Communication gap is one of the biggest problem between parents and their children. Listen to your child’s problems and make them feel at ease. Create a trust bond with them. It won’t be an easy feat as your teenage kids might not confide in you straightaway. But have patience, it would take some time but things would ultimately be better between you and your kids.

Avoid comparing your kids with others

This is one of the many mistakes, most of the parents make. They compare their children with other kids of same age. In no way compare your teenage children with their friends or other kids. This could hurt your children and even infuriate them. They will become angrier and turn disobedient. This will also create enmity and resentment between your children and their friends.

It might even make your teenagers feel depressed and they would begin to believe that they are not good enough for you to be proud of them. It would lead to inferiority complex in teenagers and start a negative thought process in their mind.Rather than comparing, tell them how they can do better and achieve their goals.

Admire your kids for their abilities

In their teen age kids become very sensitive and could easily get affected by your hard behavior. You should be very careful while dealing with your teenage kids. It is possible that you scold them for their own good but they take it in the wrong way. They might think that their parents are not happy with them, that they are not desired at home. It would turn them recalcitrant. It’s difficult to predict that what your kids would make out of your action or words.

Instead of reprimanding your kids for their failures, admire them for the things they are good at. Give your full support for what they want to do in place of what you expect of them. Never burden your teenage kids with your own expectations. It will enhance their self-confidence and encourage them to improve.

 

Provide them with a chance to learn from their experiences

Adolescence is the time when your child starts his or her journey towards being a grown-up. At this stage of their life they are constantly looking to be an independent person. They want to make their own identity and their own place in the social circle without using name of their parents or family background. They want to be treated as matured adult.

Give them a chance to spread their wings in the sky of life. Let them make their own decisions and their own mistakes. You could share your own experiences with them. But it won’t be much of a help for them as they wouldn’t have experienced those things by themselves.

If your kid makes an important decision regarding something, you can tell him or her about pros and cons of the decision. It would help them in making their mind whether to go ahead with the decision or not. If they go ahead with their decision and get a positive outcome from it, it would increase their confidence in their own decision making ability. They won’t be afraid to make errors and try once more.

Implement sensible house rules

Owing to their rebellious character, teenagers don’t easily accept every rule put up by their parents. If you enforce your rules upon them by forcing them, they might feel a desperate need to break them. They would start thinking that you want to run their life in your own way. And to get their right to live freely they would have to break the rules. And it will definitely lead to conflicts between you and your kids.

You will have to understand that your kids are growing and are developing their own way of thinking. Its not necessary that they would think the way you do. Their perception about the things would be different from yours.They will want reasons for everything you ask them to do. They will ask you why they have to follow certain rules which according them may not be necessary.

Teenagers would continuously reassess the restrictions you place for them.You would have to make them understand why you are setting up the rules to be followed by all the members of the house. You can even take the suggestions from your kids regarding the rules. Don’t be too strict or too lenient. Rules should be such that they could be followed easily without disturbing the decorum of the house. Moreover, keep a check on the company your child keeps, to be vigilant about his/her activities, but never sound imposing, as it might create a rift between you and your teenage child.

Once they understand the reasons behind setting up the rules, they won’t raise any objections against rules and regulations of the house. As they would already know what kind of conduct you are expecting from them, they would be able to develop their behavior aptly.

Dr Prem Jagyasi (c)

Dr Prem is an award winning strategic leader, renowned author, publisher and highly acclaimed global speaker. Aside from publishing a bevy of life improvement guides, Dr Prem runs a network of 50 niche websites that attracts millions of readers across the globe. Thus far, Dr Prem has traveled to more than 40 countries, addressed numerous international conferences and offered his expert training and consultancy services to more than 150 international organizations. He also owns and leads a web services and technology business, supervised and managed by his eminent team. Dr Prem further takes great delight in travel photography.

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