Behavior Guide

How to deal with envy

“Envy”, the social comparison based emotion comes naturally to human beings. It is the tendency of a person to compare oneself with others. A resentful emotion, envy drives a sense of low-esteem, unhappiness and frustration. It induces a feeling of “why this is not mine” kind feeling in a person and he starts self-pitying. However, envy is not bad always. There rare two types of envy including benign and malicious. The former one motivates you to achieve success and outperform others. While the latter one leads to depression, anger, low self-esteem, stress and frustration. Thus, one must deal with envy carefully. Here are some tips to help you deal with envy.

Acknowledge it

 

It’s imperative to realize and understand this emotion at the first place. Don’t feel bad, it comes naturally to human beings. The more you will try to run away from it, refuse to acknowledge it, the more helpless you will feel about it. The fact that matters is how you choose to react to your emotions, so don’t suppress it. Just think, why you feel envy, what are you going to do about it? Just try answering these questions and it will be all revealing. Self condition oneself to react positively towards it and develop a way to attain what you really want to achieve.

Say goodbye to comparing attitude

Understanding self worth is most important to deal with envy. One must understand that everyone is unique and a role to play in this world. No one can take your place and so can’t you. It is just like one being a banana compares oneself to an orange and gets mad over it. Every day you will find some one better than you in many ways. Some might have a bigger car, better house, and better personality to name a few. If you can’t help comparison then compare yourself to yourself, it will work wonders and help you evolve as a better human being.

Work out a strategy

To deal with envy asks for a strategy to let you find a way past this feeling. Identify the factors that trigger envy in you. Make sure you do not mix it with anger as the combo of these two can be really destructive. Observe your response to such feelings, how your body and you physically respond to such trigger. Check if other emotion like anger and hatred are originated by envy in your case. Once you have identified why and how envy affects your behavior, then the next step is to find ways to overcome it. Forming a proper strategy and executing it step by step will help you move forward.

Be creative

The best way to ward away negative feelings, comparison, jealousy and other toxic emotions is to canalized it to do something better. Being creative can provide an answer to it. Whenever you feel left out and far behind others, just try being creative, writing a blog, swimming, dancing, playing music, painting, and theater all such stuff will help you overcome the reactivity and feel good about your abilities.

Be happy with yourself

Learn to be happy with yourself. Understand your abilities and realize how you are different from others. Accept the fact that everyone is unique and a destiny of its own to fulfill. Feel good about the time you are living in, about how god has bestowed you with a beautiful life. Feel good about your friends around, your family, about what you are and you will see envy move away. Envy is not for happy and contented people. Learn to count your blessings that might make other envious. Being contented with what you have rather then what you could have is the key to deal with envy.

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Dr Prem Jagyasi

Dr Prem is an award winning strategic leader, renowned author, publisher and highly acclaimed global speaker. Aside from publishing a bevy of life improvement guides, Dr Prem runs a network of 50 niche websites that attracts millions of readers across the globe. Thus far, Dr Prem has traveled to more than 40 countries, addressed numerous international conferences and offered his expert training and consultancy services to more than 150 international organizations. He also owns and leads a web services and technology business, supervised and managed by his eminent team. Dr Prem further takes great delight in travel photography.

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