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How to deal with people you don’t like


One of the best ways to deal with people you don’t like is just to avoid them. Unfortunately, this strategy cannot be followed in every situation. However, there are other ways which can help you in dealing with such difficult people.

Find out the reason for not liking them

First of all, you need to find out what exactly you don’t like in that person. It may be that you don’t like their social or political views, their voice, or you are bothered just because of their appearance. It could also happen that you are just critical of the way they are raising their children. In short, you need to identify the traits about the person who annoys you. Then ask yourself if you can accept or ignore these aspects. You need to understand that nobody is perfect. Even you may have certain flaws which may be very annoying for others. This doesn’t really make you much different from the person you dislike. You can even try to make them aware of your perspective. For instance, if you don’t like someone just because of their political or social views, try introducing them to yours. However, this needs to be done in a non-threatening and friendly manner. They may react in a negative way, so you need to be careful about this. It should not appear like you are trying to unduly influence them, so try to do it in a light and jovial manner.

Focus on the positive

You may try to change those aspects in the personality of that person which you don’t like, however, chances are that you are not going to be successful every time. The best way to handle such situations is to change how you react to it and how you perceive it. You just need to focus on their good qualities and everything else will change. No one is perfect in this world, but no one is not without merit either. So, focusing on the positive traits of the people you don’t like can be an effective way of dealing with them. You will have an easier time liking them, once you start focusing on their positive traits.

Introduce them to other people

Other than trying to change those aspects in the person which you don’t like about them, you can even think of introducing them to other people. This way, you can encourage the person to emulate those people who have attributes you do like. However, it is not necessary that you always have to find someone who has attributes which you like. You can even give them the taste of their own medicine by introducing them to someone who has the same qualities which you don’t like about them – only to a much greater extent. They will certainly try to change themselves once they get to know how annoying their habits are.

Observe the way others handle them

In most of the cases, it has been observed that such people behave in a similar way around others too. You can learn to deal with them by watching the way others deal with them. You can get an insight on how to manage the situations simply by observing from third party’s point of view. Try to get someone else also into the conversation when this person starts annoying you. Bring up a topic which is relevant between two of them; this will give you an opportunity to take a back seat and play the silent role in the situation

Cut them off

This is perhaps the last resort when it comes to dealing with people you don’t like. Simply stop seeing them anymore. Although this may be quite difficult, sometimes making such difficult decision becomes very important. Talk to your boss about transferring you to another department if that person is your co-worker. If even this does not work, then seriously consider getting a new job. If the person is someone you see socially, stop attending those social gatherings. If it’s not possible for you to leave the group, then try to minimize the interactions that you have with this person. This means that you may be no longer serving on a committee or you may even have to drop the membership entirely. This is not going to be easy for you, but this has to be done, especially if you truly cannot find a way to tolerate them.

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