Jealousy can ruin relationships and spoil the life of the jealous person as well. Though friends are meant to support you through thick and thin, it is not unusual that you would meet friends who are sometimes jealous of your achievements and personality. It helps if you know how to deal with them adequately.
Understand your friendâs mental make up
All of us come from varying family backgrounds and this can influence our thoughts and actions, without actually being able to understand that what we are doing is hurtful or loathsome. Understand your friendâs family background to see if it is a hereditary problem that is associated with mental illness. In such cases, you must tread carefully and help him through the struggle gently and with care. If needed, help him seek counselling so that he can cope with the tension and get out of his faulty mental makeup. It may also be that he has gone through a lot of struggle to come up in life. People who have struggled to survive would find it difficult when others sail through success without much effort. Helping your friend in difficult situations and being there for him and guiding him through his struggles will help him get over his feelings of jealousy, thus making him treat you with respect and love.
Help him get over his jealousy
There are many ways by which you can help him get over his jealousy. First, assess as to what makes your friend jealous. If he is jealous of your clothes, you can help him by gifting him a few of yours or taking him with you while you shop. Let him have suggestions as to what would suit you and what would not. Such involvement would make him feel happy and proud of you, rather than jealous. If it your academic achievements that he is jealous of, give him tips as to how he can improve and help him in areas where he lacks expertise and need help. You may also think of arranging a few combined study sessions which can benefit him. These simple gestures will help him mend his attitude and learn to value your friendship rather than be weighed down by jealousy.
Build up his confidence
Considering the fact that jealousy always stems from a person who is insecure about himself and is not confident about his abilities, it is a good idea to try and build your friendâs confidence and teach him to believe in himself, to get him out of jealousy. Talk to him about your experiences and how you have been able to overcome your pitfalls and weaknesses and suggest ways by which he can improve and get ahead in life. Life is all about struggles and the sometimes the person who has gone through the worst kind of struggles will emerge the winner. Be sure to shift his attention to inspiring stories of struggle and faith and show him how he too can be one of them and attain tremendous success through hard work. This might help him feel better and focus on his achievements rather than yours.
Confront him
There are quite a few who cannot be changed despite repeated attempts from your part. These could be the friends who have not had to struggle in life and want everything readymade, be it success or fame. When they find that others are getting much more than them, they start feeling jealous and behave as if others are snatching what they deserve. Such people are more arrogant than jealous and they have a false sense of superiority which they want to project to everyone. Your must not shy away from confronting such people and letting them know where they belong. Tell them straight in their face about their behavior. They need to know that they donât deserve anything of what you have achieved and wealth and fame will not bring success on a golden platter. Make them understand that every laurel in your cap is your hard work and they too can achieve these if they are willing to work hard. This is enough to silence them.
Walk away
Jealous friends who cannot be changed can create a lot of friction and ill will in your friendship and such friends must not be considered as friends in the first place. Make sure that you distance yourself from such friends after every attempt to change them has fallen on deaf ears. You need peace of mind and positive people who can celebrate your achievements and encourage you to attain new heights. If your friendâs jealousy is continually affecting all areas of your life, your friend may never be able to cope with your success and will always remain jealous. Now is the time to wake up and be ready to ignore such jealous friends.
