Falling in love is only the first stage of love. Initially, it is all about the great meeting of the minds but everyone wants to feel, touch and eventually go beyond that stage. In every relationship, people want to move forward to the next step and no matter how subtly you say this, it all boils down to physical intimacy in the end.
In today’s competitive and busy world, a majority of couples find themselves juggling a hectic work life with an equally hectic life at home. From kids growing up and wanting extra nurturing at home to meeting tight targets at work while getting enough sleep, a couple may find that sex has taken a back seat. The lack of sex in a relationship can destroy a person in more ways than we can imagine at first. If they start to feel disconnected and less sexual by the day, a destructive cycle can take over.
This often comes in the form of other sex-substitutes such as alcohol and drug use, which not only destroy the person getting addicted, it can also destroy the entire family and social life.
Sex is not an issue unless a couple isn’t having any. Once this starts to happen the couple will stop talking about it altogether. This not only makes it worse, it also makes the relationship vulnerable over time. If one partner has a higher sex drive than the other and there is a lack of intimacy as a result, resentment creeps in and it can be very stressful.
Sex is meant to relieve stress not add to it, it provides an important time-out from the pressures of our daily lives and allows us to experience a quality level of closeness, vulnerability and sharing with our partners. Sex is also one of those subjects that women tend to keep bottled up because they’re afraid of eliciting an angry reaction. So it is crucial to talk about it if there is a sense of disconnect between the couple.
It can be hard to find time for sex on a regular basis once other things in life keep demanding more attention from the couple. Priorities shift and it is of utmost importance at this time to find other healthy ways such as acts of service/kind words and even non-sexual touch besides discussing it. Any means by which you provide physical comfort to your partner can be viewed as part of a fulfilling sex life. Touching, caressing and even holding hands while watching a romantic movie can also serve as important cues to your partner that you still care for them, with or without the actual act of ‘doing it’.
Often we hear about how someone is able to seduce his partner by giving him or her sensual message. This is especially true for women who have sore heels and are tired from working all day in uncomfortable shoes. An exhausted woman will be overjoyed if her partner offers her a foot message. Doing it right may even get the man something in return, which he definitely would not mind after all that hard work on her feet.
Couples need to find a way to put sex back to the top of the list. They need to find a way to reduce daily stress and vent in a healthy way instead of moving to other substitutes of sex. Both partners need to stop giving excuses that they are too busy or too tired and redirect some energy towards their relationship. A good orgasm is not just a fun and satisfying way of entertainment, it can burn calories and reduce stress. Sex therapists confirm that getting-it-on on a regular basis not only enhances life, it may extend it too.