Forgiving is such a simple thing to do but still most people seem to find it to be a very difficult thing to do. We can sometimes find it difficult because someones action against us affects our ego, the image we have of ourselves and because of this, we feel the need to hold onto that and get the person back. Holding on to an idea of yourself can be tiring, especially when someone disagrees with it.
We build up an idea of who we are in our head, and then go about our day finding ways to support that image and ignoring everything that doesn’t. Our job and role everyday becomes a task of support who we think we are, and not allowing life to tell us how we should be, instead of trying to control the outcome of everything around us. When someone attacks us, we feel threatened. We feel like they are threatening the idea of who we think we are, and therefore we become insulted. Our mission becomes revenge. We have to do the same damage to them that they did to us, and only then will we feel whole again. We feel as if the universe is balanced again.
Forgiving people for what they do and who they are is simple. Its about:
– feeling whole without needing constant reassurance
– realising that peoples actions are often a reflection of how they see themselves and not how they see you
– not needing to get revenge because when we think about it, they haven’t done any actual damage and we end up doing more damage by holding onto the anger
– being the better person by forgiving first, always
Remaining angry feels draining while forgiving someone brings a refreshing sensation to the mind.
Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned – Budda
