Itâs very important to deal with the causes of the problem that leads to addiction to alcohol, which is just a symptom. By doing so, it can be ensured that the person doesnât develop another addictive behavior, commonly known as an Addiction Transfer. Here we have given some tips to deal with an alcoholic parent.
Understanding the causes
Depression is the most common cause of alcoholism. A person becoming an alcoholic without being depressed doesnât happen too often. However, nothing better is done by alcohol other than making the person even more depressed. The sole difference between being depressed when drunk and when sober is that one forgets about his/her own self when drunk and easily loses control over their actions. Even, losing control is given as an excuse for a lot of actions. So, the person whoâs into alcohol somehow gets to ease a burden. It is much more difficult to deal with problems when you are sober. When you are drunk, you can just decline liability for a whole lot.
Talking to your parent when sober
Try finding time to sit down with your parent when both of you are calm and your parent is sober. Talk about how his or her behavior makes you feel. Cite in front of him/her the problems that you have to face because of his/her drinking. You might not be able to convince him/her completely at one go to stop taking alcohol, but drinking less can always be encouraged at the least. Ensuring your own safety and behavior, you should make him/her clear of what you would tolerate and what you wouldnât. Inform them that if they keep drinking, you would take actions, like you would leave and start staying separately or with someone else. Try and talk to your parent to encourage him/her to discuss about the reasons that might be the possible cause for the depression that compels him/her to drink. Seeking therapy for depression should be encouraged. You could ask your parent to take a slow and steady advance for reducing the dependence on alcohol. They would obviously not stop drinking right away, but you could always ask them to decrease it over a period of time.
Take your mind off the situation at home
Do not get affected. Try going out with your friends as much and enjoy life by having fun. Try taking up activities that you like and would help you rejuvenate. Take breaks to escape out of it. Join a sports team, dance classes, reading, sketching, painting or theater classes; whichever you like. You cannot anyway do much about the situation at home, so try staying with trustworthy friends who would care for you. That would help you feel secure, stable and wouldnât let you lose control of your own life. Do not start drinking yourself. Keep in mind everything that you do not like about your parent when he/she is drunk. Drinking once in a while is alright, but do not start to develop a reliance on it. Stop if you do!
Don’t depend on your parent
The condition of your parent is not your fault. In many cases, parents put the blame on their children for their habit. He/she is the one who decides to get drunk, not you. Alcohol allures a person because it helps in letting go off the responsibilities of life and actions by lubricating the ability to point blame at others. He/she might resent, more when you have to take over the responsibilities of house like when you have to pay the bills. Unless your parent proves that you can depend on him/her, do not trust what he/she says he/she would do. For instance, if you have to go somewhere out and you need a pick up, make sure you already have a plan-B in place in case he/she chooses to get drunk and forgets his duty. Being resourceful would do a great deal of help to you now and in the future too.
Contact a professional in the field of alcohol addiction
You could start with contacting a professional in the field. You should try getting in touch with the Alcoholics Anonymous or the AA. There, a great deal of time is spent trying to deal with the root cause of the problem. There must be other issues going on with your parent that leads to the behavior. In the longer run, it would be beneficial if you choose a program that deals with the root causes rather than just focusing on the symptom of alcohol consumption directly. This would make your parent refrain from developing another addictive behavior at a later stage. On the other hand, in the short term, particularly in cases where substance abuse is involved the behavior should be dealt with right away when you are unable to find a program that suits all your long term needs.
