We humans are bound to make many decisions in our lifetime; some are easy while the others are tough. One such decision, that many people find difficult to make is the decision regarding marriage. Yes, marriage is such a big commitment and a responsibility, which some people fear, as they do not find themselves ready for a lifelong commitment. Broadly speaking, marriage could be classified into two categories: arranged marriage and love marriage. In love marriage, we know the intended spouse pretty well, because we have been with him or her during the courtship period. A couple knows each other like the back of their hand, and they know the families as well. Therefore, in love marriages the confusion and the nervousness are not even half the amount that an arranged marriage presents.
People planning to do arrange marriages experience several pre-marital jitters, as they find it difficult to marry a person whom they have only met a couple of times, and hardly know well enough to spend their lives together. Moreover, they say arrange marriages is not just a bond of a couple but it is a union of two families, which makes the couple even more nervous, as they know nothing, or very little about the families of their future husband or wife.
If you have planned to tie the knot with someone your family has chosen for you then there is no need to worry, as even love marriage also has it fair share of surprises as an arrange marriage has. If you are feeling those pre-marital jitters, it is normal, just be optimistic and prepare yourself for the transformation. There are a few things you must know and understand in order to make arrange marriage successful, to bring in long lasting love and happiness into your relation.
Understanding
In an arrange marriage, a couple should try their best to know each other well. Knowing the likes, dislikes, preferences, choice, anger, what makes them happy, and knowledge of every behavioral trait can help make things easier. Initially, it can be problematic but with time, it comes naturally.
A family affair
You have to have this in mind that in arrange marriage you have to take care of everybody, and their likes and dislikes. It is not just about you and your partner but the entire family. Therefore, be prepared and you would not face any problem post marriage.
Love blooms
Arrange marriages generally do not have things like love at first sight or the initial crazy love, rather the nature of love is stable, and enduring. You can plan surprises, go to places and do things your partner likes, and try to adjust in the environment your partner loves to be in. Adjustment does not mean you should forget your likings and your own identity, it only means to go out of the way to make your partner happy and comfortable. Doing so, you will experience an upsurge in love proportion between you and your partner, and the love will stay for long, even forever.
Limit your expectations
Expectation works two ways – as a motivator and as a source of discouragement. Expectation is one thing that is a big difference between love marriages and the arrange marriages. In love marriages too much of expectations eats away the happiness and love in love marriages because both the partners start blaming each other for not matching the expectations. However, in arrange marriages the level of expectations is usually low, and it should be so in all the cases, as it keeps love and happiness intact in arrange marriages. Therefore, do expect but remember that too much of expectation is bad.
