Not all of us are lucky enough to get great roommates with whom we can relate to. Sometimes, dealing with a roommate can be a painful thing and can get on your nerves. Having a few strategies ready will help you sail through the difficulty without much ado. Check out these five strategies that can help you deal with a bad roommate.
Essential communication
Communication is very important when you are staying together. This is true when you are living in the same room. It helps if you can talk about your likes and dislikes beforehand to avoid such confrontations between roommates. In case of issues, make it a point to sit together and sort things out. Bad behavior can sometimes stem from issues that trouble your roommate at work or in college. If you are sure that it has nothing to do with you, it is best to offer help and talk to your roommate as a friend so that he/she feels free to open up and talk about his/her problems. If you can suggest a solution, do so or offer moral and emotional support so that he/she will realize the mistake and apologize for the bad behavior. Communication will help in solving all kinds of issues between people and create a peaceful and liveable environment.
Rules that you can follow
Discord between roommates is nothing new, but with the right strategy, you can minimize the altercations and make way for a peaceful stay. If you find that your quarrels are getting unmanageable, it is time that you devise some rules that both of you can follow. The rules need not be very complicated. It can be based on compromise, forgiveness and general camaraderie. Having a set of rules will help in controlling yourself when you are in a bad mood or are in a mood to throw tantrums. Set rules like remaining quiet when in a bad mood, avoiding shouting or confrontation when you have had a particularly bad day in college, remaining calm when your roommate shouts. All these rules must be shared equally in circumstances that arise from both your sides. At times, it could be you who breaks the rules and vice versa. In such cases, be fair to each other and forgive and forget. This will create great understanding and peace in your room.
Limiting your time with your roommate
Even after doing the best by setting rules and communication, if you still find that being with your roommate is a daunting task, the best way to go about it is to limit the amount of time that you spend with your roommate. This too can be set as a rule between you and your roommate. You can divide the time equally between you and your roommate as to when each one can be in the room. If you plan to study in the room today, let your roommate study elsewhere and vice versa. You can also choose to study with your friend who is in another room. This can help you cope to a certain extent, until you have an alternative plan ready like approaching the authorities for help or moving to another room.
Seek help
If you have done everything in your capacity to cope with your roommate and nothing seems to work, it is time to seek help from outside. This need not necessarily be from your hostel authorities. First, you may try to involve your friends or your roommateâs friends to settle matters amicably. Let them talk to your roommate as to what is the issue and what is troubling him/her. If he/she has an innate hatred towards you which is causing the bad behavior, there is nothing much that can be done but to move out. If there are other things that are involved which can still be taken care of, then try your best to sort it out. As a last resort, you may approach the hostel or resident advisor for settling the dispute.
Move out
Once you and the authorities have found that you and your roommate are toxic to each other, it is best to make arrangements to shift rooms, for the peace of everyone involved. You or your roommate can choose other rooms or opt to stay back, whichever works for both of you. It has to be understood that some people just cannot get along with each other with the best of efforts. Understanding yours and your roommateâs temperament beforehand will help assess your compatibility and avoid shifting rooms midway.
