Anger is a feeling which brings out the worst side of a person, irrespective of how harmless they are. The following steps will help you in dealing with an angry person without much effort.
Understand the cause and source of the anger
One thing that you must realize is that nobody gets angry just because they feel like it, anger always has a certain reason behind it. Anger is a very hard feeling to control and may convert harmless polite people to rude and unmanageable beasts. If you want to deal with an angry person, you must first get to the bottom of it, the source of his annoyance. Sometimes very small things trigger immense reactions from people and it can catch you off guard. Know the nature of the person to get an idea of what exactly could bother him and see if you find any evidence of such a thing to have happened. It also might be the case where something you said infuriated the person, not because you were rude, but because it reminded him of something which he detests. Be sensitive towards people, appreciate the difficulties and challenges they have faced which have made them unstable.
Listen patiently and stay calm
When a person is angry, they generally have a lot of frustration within them which needs to be vented out. They are full of a negative energy and this energy keeps on increasing if it is not let out soon. Be a good listener to such people because you will help them immensely to calm themselves down. Try not to get offended or excited by anything they say and be understanding as they are presently not in their senses or control. Once they have cooled down you can discuss your problems with them, but as long as they are angry, do not retaliate. If somebody is angry with you for something, allow them to say what they want because this will assure you that they do not have any harsh feelings for you deep within. They have let out all their anger and are now behaving normal which means you have passed by the worst phase.
Do not react, make allowances
When you know that the other person is annoyed and in a very bad mood, you must make some allowances. You must tell yourself that the person cannot be help responsible for his actions because he is not in the right state of his mind. Reacting impulsively would reflect how poor your understanding and relationship is with this person. Staying patient is the key to make sure that the person is not provoked any further. Remind yourself how the person was in good times when the mood was lighter and do not judge their behavior when they are angry. Anger cripples normal thinking process of a person, hence you must also not take anything they say seriously or personally. Do not get angry yourself as it will further deteriorate the condition. Stay calm and play the waiting game.
Body language
Your body language is what will save you from bearing the full brunt of an angry person. Correct body language and attitude can nullify and negate the effect of an ill tempered person. Maintain eye contact and behave sympathetically towards them so that they feel that you can understand their problem. Acknowledge their opinion and point of view, wherever necessary, do apologize even if itâs not you mistake. Rephrase their own words and arguments and put them back in their minds to make them realize that you have been listening closely and understand their issue. Stand in the correct posture and not in a casual way or they will feel that they are not being taken seriously, which will further annoy them. Avoid physical contact with an angry person but do maintain some proximity to make them feel better.
Ignore and avoid
When you see that there is no way to solve a fight then it is better to avoid them. You can judge this by the way they react to your opinions and thoughts, if they are being unreasonable about a matter concerning the two of you, you better back off until they are in a good mood. Sometimes people get angry about small things which they later themselves find very stupid and simple. They just take time to pull themselves together and cool down a bit. Do not directly avoid a person as it may further infuriate him, instead, try to make him understand that you are concerned about him and will definitely get back to him about it when he has cooled down. Give the person some time to get his facts right or a bitter truth to sink in and then only discuss upon it further. Try to deviate his mind from the topic by discussing something lighter in context to try to make him laugh and reduce his tension.
