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A Brief Guide on How to Deal with Workplace Bullying

workplace bullying

We all deserve to work in a friendly and peaceful environment. However, not everyone in your professional life is going to be civilized and supportive, you may even come across some bullies at your workplace. These people can turn your work life into a nightmare.

How to Deal with Bullies at Work

Bullying is a term we mostly associate with school-going children and teenagers and not civilized, grown-up adults. Yet, there are some people who suffer from bullying in their workplace. Bullies are everywhere, they are on the internet, school, and your workplace. Dealing with them has never been easy, but when it comes to workplace bullying, it becomes even more tricky because not only you have to maintain your dignity but also you have to make sure that your actions do not affect the decorum of the place. Here are some tips which can help you out in dealing with bullies in the workplace.

 

1. Recognize bullying

You need to first recognize that you are being bullied by your manager or colleague at work. Trust your instincts and if you feel you are being bullied or harassed it means that you indeed are a victim of workplace bullying. Once you have this realization, look around you and notice if there are other people in your office who are suffering as you are.

Is the bully only targeting you? Are there other people in the office who are afraid of the bully? Has anyone confided in you about being bullied by that person? If there are more people like you who are bullied, then you can all get together and decide how to deal with the problem. All of you standing together will have an advantage over the bully. However, this does not mean that you let the bullying continue if you are the only one experiencing such behavior.

 

2. Assess the situation

You need to trust your instincts if you are dealing with workplace bullying. You cannot just blame anyone for bullying you, first of all, you need to assess the situation. Keep a close eye on whatever is happening around you and the person in question. It may happen that even others are afraid of this person and they are also experiencing the same situation with him/her. It will be much better if you plan your strategy along with your colleagues who are facing the same problems. Numbers have great power and it will be much easier for you to convince your superiors if you have the support of your colleagues. However, if it is just you and none of your colleagues have a problem with the person in question, then also you need to take a stand for yourself.

 

3. Don’t ignore the situation

Ignoring any problem is not the solution to it. This is never going to stop the bully, in fact, not addressing the situation will encourage him/her to make it even more difficult for you as he/she will be knowing that you are not going to do anything. Allowing yourself to be a victim is not going to help you out. In such situations, discussing your problems with a trusted colleague, a mentor, or human resources (HR) support manager can be of great help. This way you can make sure that at least someone is aware of the problems which you are facing so that they can support you when you decide to take some strict action. However, you need to be careful in your approach, otherwise, you’ll just end up adding more fuel to the fire ignited by the bully.

 

4. Take good care of yourself

Bullying not only makes the victim feel uncomfortable at his workplace but also has some other devastating effects on them. Prolonged exposure to emotional abuse and severe bullying causes people to suffer from psychosomatic illness, reactive depression, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. So, it becomes very important to avoid the situation from overwhelming your physical and emotional well being. When you are being bullied and abused constantly in your workplace, then stress starts taking a toll on you because of which you even start refraining yourself from sleep and rest.

Getting enough sleep is very important if you want to survive a toxic workplace. Try some of the herbal remedies if you are having difficulty sleeping, don’t eat or drink anything after 8 in the evening. As far as the stress is concerned, you can deal with it with the help of some stress-busting techniques like yoga and meditation.

 

5. Document the bully’s action

Documenting the activities of the bully is one of the very effective ways of confronting him/her. You just have to note down the details, date, and time whenever you experience a bullying behavior. If other employees have also witnessed the incident, note down even their names. Maintain a log of every little thing, the insults, abuses, and any other backstabbing moves made by him/her. The advantage of documentation is that if you decide to seek help from HR, all the information which they will need to take action on your behalf can be made readily available to them. Remember that it’s not only you who has to suffer because of the bully, the business also gets sabotaged because of this as no one can work effectively if they are being continuously bullied by someone.

 

6. Diarise events

If you are of the opinion that this bullying and harassing will eventually stop by itself, then you are certainly mistaken. In the worst-case scenario, when all your efforts seem to have no effect on the bully, then you will eventually have to deal with this matter at a disciplinary hearing or grievance. Also, the chances of this matter being dragged into a tribunal cannot be denied. So, you need to be alert and maintain a diary of all the incidents and events when the bully tried to abuse and harass you.

Note down all the specific details like the date, place, and the actions of the bully. Also, note down the names of other coworkers who were present there. In isolation, all these incidents will not appear likely to constitute bullying, so it’s always better to have every incident in the form of a written document because when you are suffering from depression, you are very likely to forget these incidents.

 

7. Don’t play their games

No matter how much you get irritated by the bullying behavior, you have to make sure that you stay calm and avoid getting involved in their game. Stooping to their level is eventually going to make situations difficult for you only. You are working in a professional environment where a specific approach needs to be followed while dealing with any problem. Don’t get excited by their actions, it’s better to ignore them at that time because if you get into any sort of argument, they will certainly be able to set you up. A bully always expects a reaction from the other person and when you deprive them of any sort of ‘fuel’ for the fire, they may eventually relent and stop.

 

8. Try to talk it out

If the workplace bullying becomes very difficult to manage, the first thing you must try to do is to confront the person directly and try to talk to the person about the bullying ways. Be bold and keep a straight face without flinching while you talk to the bully. This will give the bully the impression that you are not as weak as he/she assumed. Talk to the bully about the unacceptable behavior and tell him that you will not tolerate it anymore and will have to take action if he/she is not willing to change. Allow the bully some time to change and record the behavior before making the final move. Let him decide whether he wants to change or not. But make sure that you give him a second warning before you finally report the matter.

 

9. Give the bully a stern warning

The final warning that you give him will be very stern and you need not be polite this time. It is something that could be affecting your work and peace of mind as well. Tell the bully very sternly that you have given him adequate time to change his ways and do not plan to go on ignoring his ways. If he is a team member with whom you deal with on a daily basis, this second warning is very important to keep the goodwill going.

Once you complain against the person, there is no chance you can get along with him and the tension will be increased. Therefore, do everything possible to make amends without external interference. Only if things go out of your hand should you take the last step which could involve a lot of fights and public spats? Be ready to face the bully head-on if you complain against him.

 

10. Know when it’s time to take some serious action

Finally, try to confront them in person. Ask directly what is bothering and the reason behind their behavior. However, if the problem continues even after confronting them, it is time for the big step. Take this issue to your superiors or the HR Manager and elaborate on how your efficiency is being affected because of the bullying. Remember to take your documentation, this will give your superiors enough evidence for taking an action against the person in question. But, it may happen that taking the matter to the HR Manager doesn’t change anything. In such cases, consider the possibility of leaving the organization for which you are working. Obviously, it is not going to be easy, but staying in a negative environment is worse than switching jobs. Besides this, you can even think of taking legal steps against the person because of whom you are facing so many problems.

 

11. Seek help from the management

Record all the instances of the bully’s deeds before you approach the management. Make sure that every instance is recorded adequately and the date and time are documented. It is important that you ensure that you have a few of your colleagues by your side to support your claims. Ask them in advance as to whether they are willing to speak in your favor before you submit the complaint. Identify a couple of them who are ready to favor you. This will help you act promptly when the management actually takes up the issue and comes to you for a detailed explanation of the matter. Make sure that you are well prepared for this session and you know all the facts related to the bullying.

 

12. Change your job

Despite the management intervention, if the bully continues to behave so, it could be time for you to look for another job. The management might not take a harsh decision if the bully occupies an important position and is good at his work. In such cases, there are limitations and matters might become worse than before, as you have complained against the bully as well. He/she might make your life hell would carry on with the bullying in other ways. Start looking for alternate options and when you get a good opportunity, make sure that you move on rather than stick to a place that will only give your great stress and lack of support.

 

Final Words

Workplace bullying is a very common problem faced by many who work in a corporate environment. The fact that it is mostly targeted at those who are weak and subdued makes the matter worse and most people who are targeted remain silent and suffer.

In case you’ve followed this guide to the end are thinking about resignation from your office, this is what you should do. You should go to the department of labor to claim constructive dismissal. However, if you are not comfortable with the idea of finding a new job, then resignation is not recommended for you. Consider this step as the last option.

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