The pain felt when you lose a child can never be compared to any pain in the world. You feel dejected, tattered and torn and lose the will to live. But life has to move on and you need to get back on track at least for the sake of your family and kids.Talk to someone about your child
The pain and loss that you feel at the loss of a child is debilitating and it can affect your entire being. Do not try to keep your pain inside, as bottled up emotions can burst like a volcano and adversely affect your mind and body. Talk to whoever is near you and offers support during this moment of crisis. Talking keeps your mind under control and you will also feel that you are near to your child when you talk. Talk about his good points, how endearing and loving he was towards you, how he had loved with passion and with finesse; every single moment that you have spent with your child will come back to haunt you during this time and having an outlet as a listener and supporter is a great relief at such times.
Do not isolate yourself
Grief can make you stop talking altogether and many mothers isolate themselves completely from the outside world in such cases. This will only make matters worse and cause you to lose control of the situation. Isolation will lead to extreme pain and mourning and many women lose their mind when left in such situations. Consciously make an effort to be around people who are there to console you and support you through the difficult times. Everyone understands the implications of losing a child and many of them will be willing to share the sorrow with you and make you feel comfortable and reduce your grief and feelings of dejection. Accept these condolences and trust yourself under their care. Just do not isolate yourself to double the grief. Isolation and depression go hand in hand and can give you the worst possible heartache before you turn into a mental state that requires counselling and psychiatric assistance.
Get support
Support groups can help you heal and get accustomed to that fact that your child is gone and can no longer be seen. Support can be in many ways. It can be your best friends, partner, relatives, co workers and professional support groups who all help you stay grounded and not break under the pressure. Whilst they understand your mental state, they would also help you understand that you still have to live for your near and dear ones and what happened cannot be changed in any possible way. Though it takes time for the feeling and realisation to sink in, support groups can surely help you from going into a depressed state of mind and to a stage where you lose your mind completely that no amount of treatment can revive you back to normalcy. If you lack in support and care during these trying times, take the initiative to get in touch with a voluntary organisation where you can recuperate your mind and body.
Life must move on
Of course, life is all about gains and losses and while you cherish the gains and rejoice in them, you also have to accept the losses and grieve for them. When the grieving is over, then comes acceptance, realisation and a lot more emotions that ebb and flow along your mind and paralyse you temporarily. Slowly try to swing back into action. Change your attention to other things so that you do not dwell much on the tragic incident. Take up meditation or yoga classes to rejuvenate your mind and body. Cultivate some hobby which you have left long time back. Interact with friends and relatives. Do anything that will keep you away from thinking about your lost child and brooding about it.
Remain busy and positive
To get back your lost energy and vigour, do not stay at home all the time. Get back to work and start doing some positive activities that will help you lift your spirits and mind. Read books, interact with others who have lost their children and practice positive thinking on a daily basis. These activities will help you to slowly come out of your gloom and get back to your normal state of mind. Though the memories of your child will always haunt you every now and then, you would have gained control of your life and mind back and would have figured out a way to move on.