Some children can appear angels for a moment but snobby, disrespectful kids at another. Dealing with such kids requires patience, understanding and quick thinking. Here are some of the ways in which you can change their disrespectful attitude.
Carefully examine
Before you decide to rebuke your child for displaying disrespectful behavior, you have to stop and think. Is such a behavior common in children of her/his age? Or is your child an adolescent? Such simple but careful examination is necessary to deal with your child’s disrespectful behavior and actions. Generally, toddlers tend to be a little disrespectful to others, they may shout ‘No,’ or ‘This is not yours,’ at their siblings or you. At this point, you must understand that it is because they are still developing and they don’t have a sense of right or wrong. Therefore, you must explain them how shouting or being disrespectful is wrong. Also, teach them more about sharing and adjustment. This will reduce their disrespectful behavior. Similarly, teens often snap at their parents. This is because they are in an intersection between childhood and adulthood. Life seems too different and changing to them. They have their issues and therefore, they may shout at you. In such cases, you need to deal with them through positive communication and friendliness.
Check your behaviour
Do you speak ill towards your children? Do you shout at them, rebuke them or ask them to shut up? Well, if you do so, then there are high chances that your children will also adopt similar behaviors. When you yell at your children, or even at other housemates or your partner, they feel like that is the way to gain attention. They also tend to feel that such a behavior is okay. So, don’t snap at your kids, try to teach them calmly. Realize that beating or shouting at the child will do no good. Therefore, use language carefully. Remember that children will reflect back what they see. For this reason, avoid arguing with your spouse or avoid shouting at your family members or children so that they never develop this bad habit. Also, even if your children behave disrespectfully or react violently, then don’t hit them back. Unfortunately, during such a situation most of the parents might hit the child. But this is not a solution. This will only worsen the situation in long run. In such circumstances, you must firmly ask the child to not hit you again. If s/he doesn’t relents, then you must use self defense rather then fighting back.
Communication is the key
Communication is actually the key to most of the problems. Generally, children, irrespective of their age or gender are disrespectful because they feel neglected by their parents. So, show your love to your children. Indulge in different activities with them. Reflect back on your feelings to your children depending on their age and maturity. Make sure that you always follow positive communication. For instance, if your child wants to watch T.V. and you don’t want him to watch, then instead of saying a direct ‘No,’ say something like, ‘Yes, you can watch it after lunch or after you complete your homework.’ This way you won’t challenge their demands and will hold a friendly relation with your child. But, if your child is being disrespectful, then instead of talking back to their arguments, just walk away from the situation. Communicate your feelings to them once they have calmed down.
Try to find out, is it the friends
Children tend to succumb to peer pressure. They may display disrespectful attitude and snobbish behavior because they want to look to cool in front of their friends. This particularly happens during adolescence because children try to fit into a group. So, children may be disrespectful, for instance, they may ask you to get out of their room or ask you to stop touching their things or calling them with their nicknames. In such cases, you should come out as strong. But that doesn’t means that you should berate your children in front of their friends or argue with them. Instead, you should simply state, ‘Don’t be disrespectful to me.’ If your children don’t understand this, then be calm and just leave that particular situation.
Take away the privileges
In worst case scenario, you must take away the privileges of your children if they behave disrespectfully. This trick will generally work with toddlers, middle school children and preteens. Giving rewards and taking away the privileges is a good way of teaching your children that disrespectful behavior will not be tolerated. For instance, if your child respectfully asks you if s/he can go out and play, then you must appreciate your child for showing respect. But if the child shows disrespect, then you can tell him that s/he is disrespectful and take away her/his favorite toy until or unless s/he behaves in a respecting manner. This way you can deal with disrespectful children and teach them the value of respect.
