A depressed wife can change the entire equation of the family. Things can go seriously wrong if you leave the problem untreated and lead to divorce and devastation. Understanding the problem and having a willingness to help her through the depressed state will not only help you save the marriage, but also improve the love and compassion between each other.
Understand the problem
Most husbands do not understand the problem deep enough when they are faced with a depressed wife. They tend to take it personally and mistake the symptoms as aloofness, arrogance and incompatibility. Understand that depression is not voluntary and your wife is not doing it purposely to create trouble in the marriage. She cannot help it and it is you who have to be very understanding towards her and help her deal with the problem. Mild depression can be dealt with at home. Be very gentle towards her and ask her if there is anything you can do to help. Do not in any way remain aloof or be angry with her for her condition. This can only make matters worse. Understanding the problem will help you cope with the situation. Be gentle and caring towards her, thereby speeding up the recovery process.
Offer her support and love
Once you know that your depressed wife needs your support and more care, you will be more willing to offer that to her. Tell her that you understand her situation and condition and will always be there for her when she is in need. This will be a huge relief for her and she will soon recover from the depression. Do not allow her to remain isolated and alone in the house. Isolation can only make depression worse and in some cases, severe depression can lead to violent and suicidal tendencies. Shower your wife with generous love and ensure that someone is always around her. If you know the reason behind her depression, you can do your bit by doing little things that will improve her condition. It is also important to take her out and allow her to meet other people so that she does not remain brooding and isolated in the house. Many a time, offering support and love can bring a positive change in the person and this feeling of being loved and understood is all that your depressed wife might need to recover from the metal trauma.
Help her cope
Most depressed people are aware of their state, but unable to do anything about it. It is in such cases, you must be proactive and help her cope with the situation. She might be feeling sad that she has caused a lot of sadness and heartache in your life. By being understanding towards her condition, you will be lifting a huge burden away from her shoulders. Help her cope with the condition by being very caring and understanding towards her. Then she will make an effort to get out of the depression on her own. Tell her that you are there for her throughout the ordeal and will do your best to do everything possible to make matters better for her. If she is struggling to cope, it is important to get her psychiatric help without fail.
Need for psychiatric help
Sometimes depression is not entirely manageable by near and dear ones. If your wife remains depressed for many weeks or even months, it could be something much more serious than you assumed. She might need medications for recovery and counselling as well. Do not feel let down at this time and think that your wife is never going to recover. Seek professional help and ensure that she is very comfortable and safe, instead of trying to blame her or feel dejected or angry at her. Psychiatric help will surely make a marked difference in her condition and with the right medication, depression can be kept under control, especially if it is a hereditary condition.
Post counselling care
After counselling and psychiatric care, your wife would require reassurance and even more care and love so that she does not feel bad about the whole episode and can be assured that you are not angry at her. Ensure that she takes the medications on time and keeps the appointments with the doctor. It is also important to plan a change of atmosphere during this time. Plan a vacation where she can enjoy and forget about the past illness and come back as a renewed and rejuvenated being, free from all mental tensions and illnesses.
