As much as this can upset parents, sibling rivalry is very common and perhaps present in every home. Sibling rivalry can be said to be conflict arising from jealousy and competition and fighting between brothers and sisters in a family. Sibling rivalry can continue into childhood and may prove to be stressful for parents. However, all is not lost as there are ways in which sibling rivalry can be handled.
In order to handle sibling rivalry, first and foremost, patience is required. Jealousy between young children is a common phenomenon and therefore, fighting arising from this is bound to happen. In a family where there are 2 or more children, parents’ love would have to be shared. Sharing is not an easy thing to do especially for young toddlers. This is a skill which kids learn over time and as such, parents will have to be patient and treat each kid equally.
As parents, it is your responsibility that all kids get your time. As such, where possible, it is necessary to spend individual time with your kids. For instance, you could spend some quality time with your older child while the baby is sleeping. Little children enjoy the attention of their parents and this is only natural. The older children may feel neglected when there is a new baby in the house. Parents could also get the older children in the house involved in looking after their younger siblings so that stronger bonds can be forged.
Sibling rivalry can also be handled through positive reinforcement. When your children are behaving well, it is important to praise them and give them further encouragement for good behavior. You could also introduce a reward system where the child gets a treat in some form for exhibiting good behavior. Of course, not all good behavior needs to be rewarded. Choose the ones which show the child is really trying and reward that. It is also important to practice equality. Treat all your children with the same amount of respect, love and attention. Do not favor one child over the other. Although every child is different and parents may find one child easier to handle than others, showing favoritism will only aggravate sibling rivalry and build jealousy. It is said that children who sense favoritism in their home will slowly begin to resent the favored child.
Next, parents should always acknowledge the feelings of all the children in the household, especially when there is a problem among them. For instance, when two young children are fighting over a common toy, parents can sit and calmly talk to the two children and explain that you understand how they feel about sharing the toy. You could further explain how sharing will make them good children. Reflective listening can be an effective tool in defusing anger and uplifting mood of young children.
