How to deal with a narcissistic coworker

Dealing with narcissist coworker while preserving your peace of mind

Narcissism ought to be a mental health disorder. The only reason most of us don’t consider it one is because it does more harm to the people around the narcissist than the narcissist himself. This tendency might affect anyone and does especially more damage when one faces a narcissist at work, as there it is necessary that we communicate and work as a team. Most of us, at one time or another, have to deal with a narcissist coworker.  In this article, we have written a few tips on how you can do that.

Every employee might have his/her own experience with narcissistic people. When working together as a team, the presence of narcissistic workers not only affects their colleagues, but also ruins the organization’s performance. Although, it’s quite annoying to move along with narcissistic employees, handling them rightly could help you to create wonders at your workplace.

1. Simply ignore

narcissist

Ignorance works very well with narcissistic people, especially at the workplace. When such self-centered people keep praising their own traits and performances, don’t control yourselves to listen to them till the end of their talks. Instead, simply tell them that you are about to take files from another desk or any other reason that suits your circumstances. Make sure that the reason you tell them needs immediate attention so that you can get away from their discussion. However, you must voluntarily come forward to describe your reasons; else, narcissistic people will take advantage of it because they might know that you are listening. Once you have mentioned your reason, just ignore their further talks and move on immediately.

2. Leave the place

Whenever a narcissistic coworker boasts about himself/herself, your presence near him/her is the reason for your troubles. So, if a narcissistic employee starts his/her charismatic talks, find yourselves a good excuse to quit the place. Literally, you could find a number of reasons at the workplace to escape away from narcissistic people. You may mention them that you are very hungry, and amble towards the canteen; or you let them know that your boss had called you for the meeting. Of course, you have to lie sometimes to avoid getting trapped with narcissistic people. Once you have excused yourselves that you have an urgent job in some other place, try to stay out of sight from the narcissistic people. Else, they may learn your intention and consider you as their worst coworker.

3. Get back to work

Get back to work

 

When you find it hard to cope up with a narcissistic employee, realize that you are actually missing your work. What else could be a suitable reason to ignore narcissistic people at the workplace. Nobody could stop you if you mention this reason. That’s why it’s one of the best ways to deal with narcissistic people at the workplace. If they continue their boastful talks, don’t hesitate to remind them about their work too. It might bring them into reality and divert their attention back to work. If there are many people involved in the discussion, let the group know that the boss is about to arrive at their desk as if you have witnessed your boss few moments back. Literally, one could use number of reasons to get back to work.

4. Change the topic

Diverting the subject of discussion is quite useful when you cannot avert narcissistic people. You may be able to use the ignorance technique only at few instances. As you will face such people many times at your workplace, you may not be able to avoid them every time. When narcissistic people boast about their achievements and favorable deeds, take part in the discussion and change the topic cleverly. Initially, blend with their conversation and then take the discussion to some other healthy subjects in a progressive manner. Make sure that the narcissistic people don’t recognize your witty intentions. When the subject of discussion is enjoyable for everyone, obviously, narcissistic people won’t restart their boastful talks, at least in the current discussion. Though it’s a temporary solution, you cannot make the narcissistic people change; they can change their attitude, only by themselves.

5. Appreciate the positive traits

Appreciate the positive traits

As every human being possesses both positive and negative qualities in him/her, narcissistic coworkers at the workplace too will have some good qualities. Try to identify them and appreciate for the same. Whenever you look your difficult circumstances from a positive perspective, you will have number of solutions to a problem. Finding a single solution wouldn’t be a tougher task. You mustn’t expect the narcissistic people to change their attitude; instead, change your attitude towards them. That’s one of the best ways to deal with narcissistic coworkers. In fact, when you approach them with a positive attitude, your actions will inspire them to become positive. As time goes by, narcissism might disappear from their character as a result of positivity.

However, every successful change takes its own time. Any workplace will become delightful amidst of narcissistic people, if you know how to deal them rightly. Take a break away from your workplace, at least once in a while to let you relax yourselves. Narcissist people tend to create a stressful environment at workplace. To best work in such environment, it is necessary you keep control over your anxiety and give your work your best shot.

How to deal with the anxiety at the workplace

Working professionals worry a lot about project deadlines, co-worker relations, top of all, their boss’ feedback and reactions. It is a completely natural aspect of life, but very upsetting at the same time. Read the article to find out how you can deal effectively with anxiety at the workplace.

1. Feelings are the root cause

decision

Feelings usually play a vital role in decision-making. It is you who can control what is within your realm. Try to relieve all the negative energies out by indulging in positive possibilities. Avoid struggling and re-struggling over something that is unachievable. Instead, utilize the building up anxiety to build your career forward. Try to suppress and accumulate your anxiety level in order to turn yourself into a better, happier and productive person. Engage in activity to calm you and take short breaks to relax your mind and the running feeling of anxiety. Stay away from problem, which you cannot help in solving, that will raise your anxiety level. Approach someone who you think can handle the situation better.

2. Face your anxiety

Anxiety levels increase when certain goals set by others are unachievable. As we are so used to having set our goals and accomplishing them according to our own convenience, when at work we are made to achieve goals set by others. There are at times when you just can’t get out of the situation, it’s like being stuck in between the deep blue sea and a shark, you need to take the plunge anyway. In cases as such, anxiety level reaches its peak point. In such situation, first communicate with yourself and try to relax your mind and work out a solution to deal with it effectively. Facing your anxiety will help you in learning more about yourself and the choices you make.

3. It is time to get a hold of your creativeness

hold of your creativeness

Stop following your usual boring patterns of daily life, try out something new and get a little crazy. This way you will feel relaxed and will not be worked up with something new coming your way. Trying out something new is just a way of preparing yourself for any and every kind of challenges in life. Do not think of changing yourself completely, only try to work around those spheres in your life, which build up your anxiety level. Start being creative while dealing with your anxiety. This way, you will remain focused and seek new methods of relieving the built-up stress. If it helps, list down your creative ideas and put them to practice.

4. Analyse your creative ideas

Once you have put down in writing your creative ideas or have made up your mind over it, put it to practice and see how it helps you. Try to draw a mind map of certain people’s reactions before you apply your creative ideas. Do not try to overdo as it may fall back to you causing undue stress. Through your creative ways, try to interact with more and more workers and help sought out any problems that you face. Keep a watchful note of what your emotional states are and how they tend to fluctuate while dealing with any of your projects. This way you can maintain control over your emotional state and improve your patience level. Do not remain serious at all times. Try to find light moments while working, where you can share a joke and have a short laugh. Remember, laughter is the best medicine of cure. Apply it in your day-to-day life to reduce your anxiety level.

5. Observe everyday

try out new skills

Keep encouraging yourself to try out new skills and tackle problems creatively, rather than sulking about them all the time. Produce long lasting behavioral patterns, which will help you, ease out the anxiety you feel while working. Once you have yourself adapted to the new behavioral patterns, it will become easier to be attached with these new habits and realize how much they help you in lowering down your anxiety levels. Observe the reactions of yourself and others while trying out your new ways of dealing with anxiety. This way you will understand not only what you have been lacking and the areas you need to work on, but also what people expect from you and how you can control the situation around you effectively.

Dr Prem Jagyasi

Dr Prem is an award winning strategic leader, renowned author, publisher and highly acclaimed global speaker. Aside from publishing a bevy of life improvement guides, Dr Prem runs a network of 50 niche websites that attracts millions of readers across the globe. Thus far, Dr Prem has traveled to more than 40 countries, addressed numerous international conferences and offered his expert training and consultancy services to more than 150 international organizations. He also owns and leads a web services and technology business, supervised and managed by his eminent team. Dr Prem further takes great delight in travel photography.

Related Articles

Back to top button
Close