How to deal with hatred

Hatred is a very strong and intense disliking for someone or something. In fact, this negative emotion is much stronger than the feeling of love. Hatred can wreck things related to your life miserably. Hence, it is necessary for you to deal with hatred correctly and make your life better.

Accept the feeling and try to find out the cause behind it

Instead of trying to deny the strong emotion, accept it. Acknowledge the fact that you hate someone or something. Denying the truth will not do you any good. Don’t think that ignoring or neglecting your emotions would help you deal with the matter or your feelings in any way. Rather, bottling up the hatred and other negative emotions like anger, hostility, etc arising out of hatred would only increase the intensity of your hatred for the particular person or thing. So, be honest to yourself and admit to yourself what you truly feel for the concerned person or object. At the same time, try to find out what makes you dislike the person or thing so much that has given birth to hatred in you. It might be a particular habit of a person that you dislike or it might be the entire personality or presence of the person that makes you hate him. Analyze the cause of your hatred without any prejudice or irrationality. You can deal with your emotion only when you acknowledge the presence and reason behind the feeling in you with full honesty.

Confront the feeling and try to overcome it

Do not hide your feeling of hatred from yourself. If you want to deal with it then face it. If you don’t confront the negative feeling then you would not get rid of the evil effects of it in your life. Also, consider that by hating something or someone you are giving much importance to them. Unknowingly you are giving the hated person or object huge attention, a lot of your precious time and thought. Ask yourself, do they really deserve this much importance and attention from you, especially when that importance or the absence of it does not make any difference to them. Realize that by hating the person or thing you are only causing pain, loss and suffering to yourself and no one else. Understand that your hatred is only making your life difficult or miserable. Think about it and realize that all this is not worth it. So, spend some time thinking how you can manage your hatred better. Find out ways to get over the feeling. This would help you create a better life that circles around you and not around the person of your hatred.

Ignore the subject or object of your hatred

A good way of dealing with hatred is simply avoiding or ignoring anything or anyone that you hate. Instead of giving so much attention to them by indulging in evil or revengeful fantasies, get them out of your mind and life. Avoid any kind of contact with such people. Replace your angry or revengeful thoughts with more positive ones about people or things that make you feel good and happy. Slowly, as you disconnect with the subject of your hatred in every manner, you will find that the thoughts of the person or thing have reduced. Along with that, the intensity of the hatred has also reduced. Over time, it might actually decrease to an insignificant feeling that has no power or intensity to make you feel bad or affect your life.

Be empathetic and not rude

When we hate someone we tend to be harsh or rude with him or her. This happens because we only think from one point of view, i.e., our own point of view, which makes us think irrationally and makes us angry. So, try to be empathetic and think from the other person’s point of view. This might make you realize something that reduces or eliminates your anger and your hatred for the person. You might understand the reason behind the incident, behavior or any such thing that caused hatred in you for the particular person. Avoid being rude or selfish. These feelings might actually ignite your hatred by blinding you and making you unable to see from the other person’s point of view.

Let past go and move on in life

Often the roots of hatred are firmly settled in the past of a person. This root cause might make you hate people or things that you relate, knowingly or unknowingly, with your past situation, incident or occurrence. In such case, you must let go off your past. You must allow yourself to overcome the past incident and move on in life without letting your past impact your present or future. Dissatisfaction from own life too might ignite hatred for other people or things. Instead of harboring jealousy and hatred for someone else, try to find pleasure and satisfaction in your own life. Once you are happy and content in your own life, you will find the magnitude of hatred much reduced or vanished from your life.

Dr Prem Jagyasi

Dr Prem is an award winning strategic leader, renowned author, publisher and highly acclaimed global speaker. Aside from publishing a bevy of life improvement guides, Dr Prem runs a network of 50 niche websites that attracts millions of readers across the globe. Thus far, Dr Prem has traveled to more than 40 countries, addressed numerous international conferences and offered his expert training and consultancy services to more than 150 international organizations. He also owns and leads a web services and technology business, supervised and managed by his eminent team. Dr Prem further takes great delight in travel photography.

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