{"id":16833,"date":"2019-02-20T00:07:10","date_gmt":"2019-02-20T00:07:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/drprem.com\/life\/?p=16833"},"modified":"2020-08-19T06:14:39","modified_gmt":"2020-08-19T06:14:39","slug":"how-to-deal-with-negative-unfair-criticism","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/drprem.com\/life\/how-to-deal-with-negative-unfair-criticism","title":{"rendered":"How to Deal with Negative or Unfair Criticism"},"content":{"rendered":"

The way how we deal with negative criticism plays a very important part in our life. If you ask someone who belongs to the clan of the successful few about criticism, they would definitely come up with instances where criticism from someone changed the direction of their life. It isn’t that the others among us don’t get criticized, we just don’t know how to accept criticism positively.<\/p>\n

Why it is hard to accept criticism positively?<\/h2>\n

There are many flavors of success including praises, criticism and unfair criticism. When you are successful, you know how much it took you to reach the place where you are. You get attached to your path and idea of your success because you have lived every moment with it. When someone praises you, you feel good as your efforts are getting appreciated whereas if you are criticized, you feel the urge to react in order to protect your idea.<\/p>

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The protective reaction is very natural. You first need to understand whether it is genuine criticism, i.e., you need to have a thorough reality check. Secondly, if that\u2019s not the case, it might be unfair criticism.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou have enemies? Good. That means you\u2019ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.\u201d
\n\u2013 Winston Churchill<\/em><\/p>\n

There are endless things that you can be criticized for. If you give your opinion, you take a stand for somebody, you achieve what you have always been aiming for, you introduce some new concept, or you start up something that nobody else has done and so on.<\/p>\n

\u00a0\u201cOne mustn\u2019t criticize other people on grounds where he can\u2019t stand perpendicular himself.\u201d<\/em>
\n\u2013 Mark Twain<\/em><\/p>\n

Dealing with unfair criticism can be tricky. We first need to understand what unfair criticism is. People might merely give their opinions without understanding how it feels to be in the other person\u2019s shoes.<\/p>\n

When you face unfair criticism, there are some points that can help you to deal with negative criticism positively –<\/p>\n

5 – Tips to help you\u00a0deal with negative criticism positively<\/h2>\n

1. Face the truth<\/strong><\/h3>\n

\"frustration\"<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t give the critics an authority to drive your vehicle. When you are driving the vehicle, you know exactly where you want to lead it whereas if critics take up the steering wheel, they get the authority over where to lead you. In the latter case, it becomes impossible to deal with negative criticism.<\/p>\n

2. Have faith in your work<\/h3>\n

No one apart from you knows the number of efforts you have put in. Developing any reaction like anger or frustration in response to the criticism will mean that you gave the critic an authority to change your temper or as explained in the example, give an authority to them to drive your vehicle.<\/p>\n

3. Don\u2019t take criticism as an insult<\/strong><\/h3>\n

\"words<\/p>\n

Hear out what others have to say but don\u2019t hold on to any point of view. It\u2019s important to let go. Holding on to the criticism will only make you vulnerable to negativity. We often end up thinking and re-thinking about the negativity that has been triggered towards us.<\/p>\n

4. Look at the positive side<\/h3>\n

It is very natural as humans that we focus more on criticism than the praises. The Prospect theory says that we are more likely to concentrate on things that have unknown probabilities. While focusing on keeping away from the negative, we often neglect the positive. We need to focus more on the positive rather than the negative. The positives can help us move ahead with our tasks whereas the negatives will weigh you down.<\/p>

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5. Accept the reality<\/strong><\/h3>\n

\"man<\/p>\n

As mentioned earlier, one of the most important steps to deal with negative criticism is to have a reality check<\/a> of your situation. If someone is criticizing you, think whether you are lacking somewhere. Being honest with ourselves<\/a> is very crucial in any kind of situation. If we are not honest, it is self-deceit. We are fooling ourselves by not viewing the actual situation.<\/p>\n

6. Be true to yourself<\/h3>\n

We try to believe in facts that are not true and maybe the critics are in a better position to catch hold of that. It will not only give a chance to the critics to be more powerful than you are but also you will be in a very vulnerable position to such criticism. The fullest of our potential comes out only when we are true to ourselves in every possible way. When we are true to ourselves, we know for sure what our weaknesses and strengths are. When we are aware of these, we are also alert and in a position to take action on any imbalance in the situation.<\/p>\n

7. Control your reaction<\/strong><\/h3>\n

\"Avoid<\/p>\n

Giving a harsh reaction can lead to a disturbance in your own thought process. You might react at the moment but later on, regret reacting to something that does not matter. So if someone is being rude, simply ignore the person or if it\u2019s a senior or elder, politely postpone the topic and avoid it. Prioritize and understand the opinions of who matter to you and completely let go of those opinions that don\u2019t matter.<\/p>\n

8. Avoid eye contact<\/h3>\n

Body language is one aspect that can help avoid someone in such a situation. Cut eye contact with the person. Eye contact is a very important aspect of a conversation; so when there is a restriction in eye contact, the person talking to you might get the signal of not talking further. In addition, moving away from the scenario can also aid the requirement.<\/p>\n

9. Think about how criticism can be applied positively<\/strong><\/h3>\n

\"Think<\/p>\n

Be it constructive or unfair criticism, lessons can be learnt from both. If the critic says something that is unjust, instead of feeling bad about it, you can simply try to observe the critic and understand why they are being negative. Moreover, it can also help you deal with other such comments coming your way later on; your mind can get resistant to such kind of negativity.<\/p>\n

10. Keep moving<\/h2>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t be distracted by criticism. Remember \u2013 the only taste of success some people have is when they take a bite out of you.\u201d<\/em>
\n\u2013 Zig Ziglar<\/p>\n

To deal with negative criticism is the only option we have as we cannot avoid it. However, in order to keep moving forward<\/a>, we must keep a distance from it. Criticism is a part of any kind of success of beginning. Its value diminishes as and when you stop giving importance to it. You should give importance to it but only when it leads you into a positive direction.<\/p>\n

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