Any death in itself is a sad affair. It denotes the end of a life and yet we accept it as a part of life. We realize that it is only fair that after a certain amount of time spent on this earth an individual finally completes his life cycle. While we accept deaths of people who are ailing and old, the death of a child is a matter that is unacceptable. For parents who lose their child it seems like the end of the world and they hardly have a reason to live. As difficult as it may be, they do however have to continue with their lives and thus in this article we will be telling you about some ways to cope with the loss of a child.
Some things to follow to cope with the loss of a child
- Accept the death and your emotions:
As sad and hurtful as it may be, you do have to come to terms with the idea that the death has occurred. It would be shattering for you from all quarters and yet you must deal with it face to face. The post traumatic stress disorder only gets worse if you stay in denial of what has happened. Accept the pain and let yourself express the emotions. This is one of the first things to do to cope with the loss of a child.
- Don’t expect a fixed pattern: The mechanisms to cope with the loss of a child would be different for each individual. You cannot expect that within a fixed time limit an individual would be through with the grieving process. Nor can you expect a standard method of dealing with this immense sorrow. Let each individual choose her own way because the pattern or time limits do not matter. What matters is the acceptance and the naturals of defeating the post traumatic stress disorder.
- Take time off work or get involved in work:Here too we would not recommend a single one way to go about it. For some people a break is necessary after such a tragedy. They need to take their minds off work and be with their loved ones or in solitude. For some others however it is the other way around. They find it easier to immerse themselves in work to forget about their loss and keep their minds off the thoughts of their child. Both are acceptable ways and you just need to pick one that is the best suited for you. Like we keep saying, it is all about you coming out of this extreme trauma that you experienced with the loss of your child.
- Do not get involved in drugs and alcohol: Some people are so lost with the idea of how to survive after losing their beloved child that they get involved in substance abuse. Some take to drinking too much and others seek refuge in the wonder world provided by drugs. None of this is a sustainable solution. If you choose these to cope with the loss of a child then remember that these will only provide temporary Apart from the irreparable damage to your health these would actually make you so dependent on the substances that without them you will not be able to bear with the real idea of the loss.
- Turn to religion:
Religion often comes as the pain relief when it comes to dealing with death. You may or may not have been a religious person before but if you seek shelter in the solace of religion chances are that you would find peace. A God loving person deals with a death better than an atheist and if you are finding it too difficult to deal with the loss spending time with your faith can help the cause.
- Delay decision making: Remember that after such a great loss your mind is in no state to make rational decisions. Any major decisions that you may take now can end up being hasty and random decisions that you might regret later. So, in such circumstances, delay the process of decision making. Do not decide on a divorce or on a plan to move out of the country or change your residence. If anything wait the initial months out before you come to a conclusion.
- Trust the healing power of time:
Time and tide wait for none. And time would not wait forever for the loss of your child. Such is the power of time that even the biggest of loses are forgotten easily over a considerable time period. To cope with the loss of a child trust in the healing powers of time. Even when the going gets tough remember that it is going to get better and keep patience with this belief system.
- Provide creative outlets: Creativity is among the biggest painkillers. When you are bogged down by too much of sorrow remember to give time to your creative outlets. It could be something as simple as a sketch or a nice poem remembering your child. It could be any form of art that catches your fancy. Not only will it help get past the hard times, it would also manage to take some of the incredible sorrow away even if it does so momentarily.
- Stick together as a family:
The very essence of a family is to stick together during the tough times. In trying to cope with the loss of a child remember to stay close as a family unit. All grieving members and relatives can help each other overcome this stage. The husband and wife particularly need to stick with each other and support each other emotionally in possibly the hardest of situations since their marriage.
Dealing with death is never as easy as it seems to be. The acceptance comes with time and with a set of actions that you must follow. While the loss is never forgotten we hope that this article provided you with tips on how to survive. Life does go on and we hope things will be alright for you with time.