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How to revive your sex life after being a victim of sexual abuse

Sexual abuse is actually a vast term which is often misunderstood. Sexual abuse does not just include rape or forceful intercourse but also harassing someone with sexual innuendoes, content and touching them inappropriately. Sexual abuse is more common than we would like to believe and one out of three to four women are sexually victimized in some way or other.

 Sexual abuse

Sexual abuse can happen between partners in a committed relationship. People question the seriousness of marital rape but what they don’t understand is that forced intercourse is always a form of physical abuse. A woman or man who has been through sexual abuse also receives a huge emotional bruise.

If you have been a victim of sexual abuse or know anyone who has been then remember that it will definitely take time to get back to normal sex life. Be patient and try your best to think positive. Here are some guidelines to help you through.

How does sexual abuse an individual’s sex life?

Sexual abue concept. Brutal man rapeing young woman

No matter what is your relationship status or if you have an active sex life, sexual abuse can ruin your ability to enjoy sex for a period of time. When someone is raped or sexually violated the abuse sends some messages to the victim’s mind. The person feels unsafe, humiliated and helpless.

The abuser makes them feel that their desires are not important. Such a strong negative message creates some blocks in the victim’s mind. They cannot enjoy sex without remembering the past events of abuse. They also lose their capability of trusting potential partners.

The indelible wound of sexual abuse cannot be forgotten yet it can be accepted. In many cases the rape victims are blamed for what happened to them. If they stop blaming themselves and accept the situation as it really is then their chances of healing also increases.

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Identify the triggers

 Sex

A certain word or phrases, smell, ambience, lighting, sounds can bring back a flood of memories associated with the incident of sexual abuse. Every individual who has been sexually abused have some of these triggers.

Even in the most intimate moment, the most lovingly uttered words can act as trigger because something similar was said by the abuser. Identify your triggers without being afraid. Try to avoid these triggers. If you feel comfortable then you can tell your partner about these triggers so he too can avoid them during your intimate sessions.

Self-value is the best value

Couple dancing

In many cases victims find that they have no one to support them emotionally. Even close ones may disassociate themselves after the incident. The individual must regain their sense of self first to get back to leading a healthy life. Long term sexual abuse can make one incapable of saying no to sex.

If you find yourself in a similar predicament then first find your inner self and learn what you truly desire. Sex is not bad. It is not supposed to be a tool of abuse. Even you can enjoy sex and gain both physical and mental pleasure from it but the only condition is that it has to be consensual.

You and your partner must be on the same page regarding the sexual union. Take your time and get into a sexual relationship only when you are completely comfortable with your self.

Sexual abuse can change the way an individual perceives sex or desires physical intimacy. It creates a deep scar in one’s psyche. Every person who has been through some form of sexual abuse should learn to accept the incident and remember that it was not their fault.

Dr Prem Web Network