Do you have teenage kids in your home and you always remain confused about the queer ways that they follow? Do you find it extremely difficult to understand what they want to convey? This is not your own unique problem. More than half the population finds it difficult to understand their teenage kids. The kids in turn complain too, that their parents will just not try to understand them. This eventually widens the gap between the kids and their parents and the children go beyond the control of their parents due to extreme communication gap. Here are some of the common things that the teenage kids want to relate to you and you fail to understand:
1. Try to imagine yourself in their place
Kids often try to convey to their parents that they find it really awful to face a warlike situation at home always. They are just unable to understand why parents do not seem to understand them at all and always look for options for scolding or abusing them. They also remain perplexed thinking that no matter what they do, their parents always look for more from them. For instance, when the peer group tells them to try out marijuana or cocaine for once and that is not going to be something really awful, the kids always restrain themselves thinking such an act will go against the likings of the parents. Still, parents find them unruly and disobedient. Thus, giving freedom will not harm your kid much.
2. Understand that they are thanking you
It can never be expected that kids will thank the parents for every thing they do. But that does not convey that the kids are not aware of the sacrifices, duties and the labor the parents invest for the upbringing of the kids. Kids, in their teenage start considering them as adults and thus, expressing thanks to the parents directly appears childish and embarrassing to them. But they do express their gratitude in the form of body languages that the parents need to interpret. It can be in the form of gifting the parents or chatting open-heartedly together when the parents might not have expected so or by means of lending a hand in whatever parents do.
3. They are afraid of the transition of their life
Teenage is the most crucial stage of development in the life of a kid. So, they often pass through phases of turmoil in life that appear new to them. While some are easily handled by them, others appear really tough to be identified by them. For instance, teenage kids no longer get afraid by apparitions. But the declining and stained relationships of the close ones, divorce of their parents, remarriage and the arrival of a foster parent or sexual abuse are some of the things that might make them shattered and devastated. Thus, it is crucial for parents to treat kids as matured persons and talk to them openly about their problems, so that they donot suffer from the sense of loneliness and frustration.
4. Do not force them to perform
Majority of the kids have talents other than academics too. While some are excellent at football other might be excellent dancers or even talented pianist. This extracurricular genius might often fetch them prestigious awards. But parents of most of such children have an odd habit of asking them to perform in front of guests. This is really foolish as the parents forget that the kids have grown up and might feel extremely shy and shaky to perform everywhere and anywhere. The kids’ rejection in such situations is often looked upon as disobedience. If you often pass through similar circumstance, instead of looking at things this way, try to understand the feeling of your kid and think repetitively before asking something like this from your teenage kid.
5. Never compare your kid with others
Kids, in their teenage are extremely vulnerable. They become sentimental very easily and commit things that can be dangerous for them as well as the parents too, such as being suicidal, adopting addictions out of frustration, etc. So, dealing with kids at this stage should be done with extreme carefulness. Parents often have a habit of comparing their kids with others. This is a very bad practice and the kids feel humiliated and insulted, which most of the parents fail to realize. If you do not want your kid to suffer, then never compare him or her with others. Understand the kid’s limitations and guide the kid accordingly so that the teenage child can give his or her best within his or her own limits.