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Useful tips to handle the first crush of your daughter

Useful tips to handle the first crush of your daughter

Sooner or later, your daughter is going to come up to you and talk about her first crush at school. As a protective parent, what would you do? Will you admonish her for showing interest in the boy or would you let her deal with the phase herself? Either way, her studies would go for a toss, if you do not handle the issue delicately. Therefore, here are some tips that can help deal with your little girl’s first crush.

The first thing you need to ascertain is whether you are responsive enough for your girl to tell you about her crush in the first place. Are you too strict a parent that your girl fears of telling you about her crush? Or are you too unresponsive that she feels it would be a waste of time telling you? Your attitude towards her as a parent is what would make her either tell about her crush to you or hide the information completely until you find out about it yourself.

Ok, now that you found out about your girl’s crush, what do you do? It is no point in lambasting or chiding her about her feelings for she would feel the same way you would if someone were to say that your feelings were meaningless. Instead, sit down with her talk it out. Encourage her to talk about her crush and know what she likes in him. This way, you would be giving her the idea that you are responsive enough for her to confide her feelings. This would also ensure that she starts talking to you more about these things and would be more open for advice from your end on how to deal with the matter.

Crushes are normal. Understand that. Just as you had crushes in school and college, your daughter would have them too. So do not go beating around the bush when trying to talk to her about it. Be open and communicate freely with her. Be a friend and let her know that although crushes are not bad, they should not interfere with other aspects of her life, mainly studies. Also, make it a point to let her know that it would be impossible to get someone’s attention by stalking them, writing love letters or making blank calls (in case she does any of these things).

If the crush is mutual and the boy also has feelings for your daughter, the next question that would arise in your mind is, how do I stop them from seeing each other? The answer is don’t try to do any such thing. The more you restrict them, the more they would try to see each other behind your back. A crush is a part of growing up. Therefore, instead of restricting her completely, set limits that she would need to follow if you give the green signal. This will enable your girl to draw the line when and where you tell her.

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