The Dilemma That Comes with Office Romance
Our office is a place where we spend a great deal of our waking hours every day. Office is not just a place where we work but also a place where we communicate with others, we eat, joke around, and make friends. It would not be wrong to say that office is like another home because the time we spend there every day is equivalent to that we spend at homes. This is why some people find it better and lucrative to look for romance in office only, as they think they know the ones better with whom they work in office for long hours every day.
Moreover, life today is so busy that people find it hard to take out enough time to spend with someone and find a partner for them. Therefore, office seems to be a good choice for romance because it is like you get to spend a great deal of time with a person who is your colleague in office and your beloved too.
Reality is Not the Same
In reality, things are a bit different, and this topic of office romance is complicated. Many organizations literally ban office relationships, and in case a couple gets married, the one of the two has to resign from office. They do not entertain such relationships. On the other hand, some organizations encourage romance and love, as they believe that it brings down the distraction, which gives them efficient employees.
Therefore, there is a lot of confusion; in fact, it would not be wrong to say that workplace romance is a big dilemma. Nobody is clear as should they go for it, does it have a positive or a negative effect on people, and like. The answer to all these doubts and questions is that workplace romance is a combination of positive and negative feelings, and it does have a fair share of advantages and disadvantages.
The advantages of workplace romance
When our partner is away from us, we spend massive time on texting each other or talking to them over phone. Talking during lunch break is fine but sometimes the urge to talk to one’s beloved is so strong that people tend to ignore their office work and utilize a great deal of time to get in touch with their partner. However, if your partner is in the same organization which you are in, you would feel more secure and happy, as your mind knows that your partner is just a few steps away from you.
You can see each other a number of times in a day and you do not even need to take leaves or half days to go out on lunch, as you can enjoy superb meals together in office food courts almost every day. Working in same office, the partners are like the pillars of strength for each other. They can share every little problem with each other because they know that their partner can truly understand what they are going through. The biggest advantage of a workplace romance is that it makes the office atmosphere exciting and happy for you, which makes you an efficient employee in an organization.
The disadvantages of workplace romance
The little birdie goes and tells about your romance to every employee and the boss, some of them start teasing you, some might feel jealous, and your boss starts taunting you. Disgusting and frustrating this situation becomes when everybody in the office seems to be interfering with your romance all the time.
For over possessive people the workplace romance becomes a tension because they do not like anybody else talking to their partner in office. Sometimes a couple needs a break from each other’s company but while working in the same office, it becomes difficult for a couple to have that break, which causes conflicts and tension between them that eventually leads to a big fight. An ugly breakup could even put your job at risk.
How to Handle Office Romance
There are millions of ways of falling in love and one of the most common places where people fall for each other is in the office. This is treacherous because you need to work and maintain a relationship with everyone else at the office as well. You have to be very careful all the while. You cannot disappoint the one you love and at the same time, you also cannot disappoint your bosses and your colleagues. Indeed, you are in an extremely tricky situation with absolutely no idea about what to do. Here are a few tips that will help you out –
1. Don’t Mix Professional with Personal
This is a very obvious advice but also the hardest to follow. How would you keep personal and professional separate if your soul mate works in the same office as you? This needs effort from both ends. You have to talk this out with your partner and let them know that you would like to have a work life balance and hence, you guys should not be behaving like a couple in the office. If your partner is mature enough, he or she will understand and will not nudge you further.
2. Mix with Everyone in the Office
It is indeed very tempting to spend every single free moment with your better half but watch yourself in time. It isn’t just the 2 of you who work at this office. There are a whole lot of other people. Moreover, in the corporate world, you never know who you are going to need to stand up for you. Thus, talk to everyone in the office instead of just talking to your loved one all the time. This will take some effort from you but it will reward you in time.
3. After Office Hangouts
It is but natural that the 2 of you will hang out together post office hours. Make sure that you don’t offend anyone while you are at it. If possible, don’t hang out near the office area where you are likely to bump into office people. Hang out somewhere far off. Yet, sometimes there will be other people who will want to hang out with you. Take those other people and accommodate them once in a while. You have no choice but to adjust. This is just one of the downsides of an office romance and you will have to put up with it.
4. The boss is off limits
Do not make the mistake of dating the boss or some you report directly to or vice versa. Most companies have policies, which may require you to reveal your relationship. You certainly do not want to be caught in a situation where you are involved with the boss and people find out. In some cases, there may be leniency with such affair. However, you do not want go get caught in a power struggle wrangle. In addition, it would be very embarrassing to be entangled in allegations of favorable treatment. It is best to avoid such situations.
5. Work when you are at work
Remaining productive is a big challenge for those who engage in office romances. Your mind is pre-occupied. This greatly diminishes your performance viz. your productivity. You need to maintain your performance before the commencement of the romance. Avoid situations that could expose you to poor performance and comments from superior and juniors. It is important to stay at your workstation and do your work well. You will have plenty of time to see your special someone after work.
6. Be impartial
Giving special treatment to that special man or woman is leading them to disaster. Do not do anything special or favors that are work related. This will quickly turn your colleagues against you. Some colleagues are very sensitive to favoritism and this may not sit well with many. Do not defend your significant other to the boss and other situations where they may be on the wrong. Let your significant other carry their cross and be answerable for themselves at all times, unless a situation gets out of hand and you need to step in as a voice of reason.
7. Do not use the work computer for other business
On the corporate email system, do not send any emails that are not work related/ your employer is able to see all the emails sent and it certainly would be a shame to have your boos discover your escapades. Ensure that you keep things professional.
Could Your Office Romance Really Be a Viable Relationship?
Spending a great deal of time in office, sometimes doing extra hours just to ensure your good position in the company, and living with the team as one family, all are qualities of efficient employees who take a company to all new heights. They are good employees and are supposed to maintain the office decorum and value the work ethics but first they are human beings.
They have an instinct called love in them, and this naughty instinct makes some employees fall in love with each other, and majority of the times the office romances have disastrous consequences not only for the couple but for the company as well.
Probably this is why many organizations do not encourage office romances. However, if a couple exerts control over emotions and do everything just right, then there is nothing stopping office romance from being a viable happening. Following are some tips, guidance, and rules everybody must consider who want to indulge in something known as office romance.
1. Check with the company policy
The first thing that should come to your mind is the office policy, as in whether they allow any office romances or is it a sin. If the company does not entertain any such happenings, then refraining from office romances works best in your interest. If you find yourself unable to do this then come what may, you have to have control over your emotions and feelings and socialize outside your workplace.
2. No contact through office technology
Never use your office technology, as in e-mails and texting each other from the official account or using official telephone line to call each other. You should know this that offices have absolute authority to keep a check on each happening, they can check your mails and tap telephone calls if required and you could be trapped. Therefore, keep it private and date with discretion.
3. Be hush about it
Many employees look down upon office romances, and if such people get to know about your affair, they are potent enough to make your life in office miserable. Imagine yourself passing by and some of your colleagues checking you out and passing some remarks. This would not happen if you and your partner keep your relation secret as far as possible.
These were some tips that can help you have a blissful office romance, and if you do not consider all these rules then following are some risks that you might experience:
4. Others think of you as partial
If you are the boss and you have fallen in love with your subordinate then obviously you would like to give her a special treatment over others. If you practice such a behavior then all the other employees would form a negative opinion about you for being a partial boss, and this could damage your company’s performance.
5. Be practical
You are the boss, your relationship with your subordinate ends and you fire her, or both work at same level in the company and after breakup one decides to quit the company. This is not how it should be; you must have a practical and a realistic approach to all this. Be brave enough to withstand the after effects of your broken relationship while being there in your respective job profiles.
Office romance is not everyone’s cup of tea for sure, as only those who have extreme control over their emotions and mind, or the ones who value office rules can have a successful office romance.
