The Secret to Happiness:
Since ancient times mankind has been on the pursuit of happiness. Starting from the birth of religions to framing of rituals, from god appeasing sacrifices to establishing social norms, all decisions and actions have been taken solely to insure man from sadness and result in happiness.
But centuries of existence have only proved the truth that life for anyone and everyone would always be a mixture of happiness and sadness. Irrespective of who you are, what you do, where you live and which god you follow, there will always be that share of unhappiness and tragedy in your life like everyone else in this big wide world. But the question remains that why then are some people happy and some not?
You might say that it’s a direct function. More happiness with lesserdifficulties and vice versa. But pause for a few moments and think about what you said. Is it really the truth? Don’t we see enough examples all around to tell us otherwise? What then is the reason behind a rich and comfortable person always beingunhappy with his work, career, marital life, whose life is filled with tensions about everything andirritation at every moment while a poor village peasant who can hardly make two ends meet living comparatively happily and with a lot more inner peace?
What then is the key to happiness? The true magic wand that can turn your life from a mere day-to-day fire fighting for survival to a blissful experience?The answer to this lies in just one phrase – Your decision to be Happy. Yes, your decision to be happy is the sole factor on which it depends whether you are happy or not and the thee pronged Decision – Reaction – Control Strategy is the perfect way to be happy.
Decision:
The ‘Decision’ aspect in the ‘Decision – Reaction – Control’ Strategy, as said earlier, is your first and most important principle which refers to your decision to be happy. Decide to be happy when you get up each morning. The first thing you should think about is ‘Yes, I will be happy today’ when you open your eyes. A good practice is to stand in front of your mirror, even before you brush your teeth and look straight and tell yourself loudly ‘I Will be happy today’ or ‘I decide to be happy today’. If you decide to be happy when you start your day, your entire way of going about doing things would change and whenever you face any irritation point, remember what you decided in the morning and say it to yourself again. If you are unshakeable in your own decision, then there’s nothing or no one that can result in your mood swings.
Reaction:
Stemming from your decision to be happy at the start of the day, the usual positive outcome can be seen in all your reactions. Reactions to day to day petty things such as towards an irritating habit in your husband, or your children’s lack of energy in doing homework, or that sudden deadline at work, all of which would otherwise have drawn a wrath from you, certainly a reaction which was a mixture of anxiety, tension, irritation leading to a few moments of screamingand swearing leading to a definite disruption of inner peace would now be replaced by a much more subtle response. Just a deep breath and remembrance of your decision to be happy is all it takes to keep that gleaming spark in your eyes, the bounce in your walk, the causal toss of your head in a slight indifference towards petty aspects that actually do not matter and that grim determination of your set jawline giving you more energy to do your work efficiently. Ultimately , you see a shift in your attitude through your reactions. A reaction which is almost like a challenge to the world saying ‘Come what may, I’ll be happy’.
Control:
The last ‘control’ aspect that comes from imbibing this attitude towards life is the control on your own happiness. Most people are unhappy since their happiness quotient comes from external people and not themselves. But why would you give the control of something as crucial as happiness and inner peace of mind to other external people? Whether you are happy or not, the control on that should essentially depend on you alone and no one else. When you decide to be happy at the start of the day, what you’re essentially saying to yourself is that ‘I’ decide to be happy, subconsciously telling yourself that the key to your happiness in your own mind and with your own self.
True, that human beings are social animals and mankind’s existence has always been with and about other people. Your happiness usually depends on your loved ones and the most common reason for anyone’s unhappiness in one particular day is that he / she has heard something hurtful from a loved one. But what you need to understand is that there exists a thin line of difference in being hurt and being unhappy. While you can of course be hurt by what people say but don’t let that bother you so much that you spoil your day. Remember, each day is a gift to us from god and you should give no one the right to spoil your day in anyway. Your inner happiness and peace is only and only dependent on you and nobody else. Accept the fact that you are hurt but also tell yourself ‘So what if he said that? He had his own reasons to say. I decided to be happy today and I will not let anybody spoil my day!’
So the only saying that gives you clues to all that you need to be happy in life goes like this:
Decide to be HAPPY when you start your day. React with JOY, whatever comes your way. You may be hurt by what people say, but don’t let anyone spoil your DAY.”
Learn it. Live it.
